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The Bond Movies & Actors I Can't Stand (Negativity Only Please)

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  • doubleohdaddoubleohdad
    Posts: 1,146
    (shrug) You've got to be rude simply because you have no other choice. Watch Moore flop around the top of the train in OP and tell me he's a physical incarnation of hat Fleming's Bond was all about.
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    Sark wrote: »
    In coming years people will come to hate SF (maybe overstating it but thats what this thread is for ;) ).
    Every time they watch it they'll find themselves shouting "Why is Q so stupid?!" "How the hell could Silva know that?!" And "oh come on!" As the plot holes big enough for Dalton to wheelie a semi truck through become more and more obvious with repeated viewings.

    Sooooo true. And Brosnan is rubbish.

    Great thread btw @chrisisall
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,798
    doubleohdad wrote: »
    (shrug) You've got to be rude simply because you have no other choice.
    It was a joke. :D
    I actually happen to agree that Moore is not the Bond of the Books- he's just too nice. But you seem to have wanted Chuck Norris in the role the way you go on and on about the tough guy thing. Have you read any novels? Bond is resilient, but he never came off to me as a world class cage fighter or anything... =))
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    chrisisall wrote: »
    doubleohdad wrote: »
    (shrug) You've got to be rude simply because you have no other choice.
    It was a joke. :D
    I actually happen to agree that Moore is not the Bond of the Books- he's just too nice. But you seem to have wanted Chuck Norris in the role the way you go on and on about the tough guy thing. Have you read any novels? Bond is resilient, but he never came off to me as a world class cage fighter or anything... =))

    Chuck Norris? THAT would have been amazing. Or Jason Statham.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,798
    I say they should have gotten Bruce Lee. They could have done a reverse YOLT & made him white.
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    chrisisall wrote: »
    I say they should have gotten Bruce Lee. They could have done a reverse YOLT & made him white.

    Genius. Why aren't we running EON?!

    I mean, seriously.
  • ChangChang
    Posts: 107
    Goldeneye is just as horrible as the other three Brosnan's.

    When Judi Dench M died in Skyfall, I thanked Silva. Enough of that crank. She always dragged the whole thing down.

  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    Chang wrote: »
    Goldeneye is just as horrible as the other three Brosnan's.

    When Judi Dench M died in Skyfall, I thanked Silva. Enough of that crank. She always dragged the whole thing down.

    I actually agree. I didn't mind her to start with but over time I found her and her issues with Bond increasingly tedious. Best thing about SF was seeing her finally get bumped off. Dench ended up taking far too much screen time as well.
  • ThomasCrown76ThomasCrown76 Augusta, ks
    Posts: 757
    Roger Moore is the bond most likely to succeed...at catching the clap
  • doubleohdaddoubleohdad
    edited January 2015 Posts: 1,146
    Chang wrote: »
    Goldeneye is just as horrible as the other three Brosnan's.

    I don't agree. Are there things in GE I don't like? A few Moore-esque gags in the tank chase, but overall it's very well shot and a pretty good story. The fight stuff is just head and shoulders above the other Broz Bonds, and he feels young and kinetic in this film, and old and slow in the other three.
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    doubleohdad wrote: »
    Chang wrote: »
    Goldeneye is just as horrible as the other three Brosnan's.

    I don't agree. Are there things in GE I don't like? A few Moore-esque gags in the tank chase, but overall it's very well shot and a pretty good story. The fight stuff is just head and shoulders above the other Broz Bonds, and he feels young and kinetic in this film, and old and slow in the other three.

    I have always hated GE since I first saw it at the cinema in 95. A Barry score and Dalton the lead might have saved it.
  • NicNacNicNac Administrator, Moderator
    Posts: 7,582
    Moving to Bond Movies.
  • doubleohdaddoubleohdad
    Posts: 1,146
    Getafix wrote: »
    doubleohdad wrote: »
    Chang wrote: »
    Goldeneye is just as horrible as the other three Brosnan's.

    I don't agree. Are there things in GE I don't like? A few Moore-esque gags in the tank chase, but overall it's very well shot and a pretty good story. The fight stuff is just head and shoulders above the other Broz Bonds, and he feels young and kinetic in this film, and old and slow in the other three.

    I have always hated GE since I first saw it at the cinema in 95. A Barry score and Dalton the lead might have saved it.

    Hm. I'd rank GE over both of the Dalton films, though the first two sequences in TLD are really, really impressive, some of the best in the series. Both GE and TLD still have remnants of the Moore era, with a pinch of the silliness, but like them both, with GE having a much, much better ending than both Dalton films, IMO.
  • timmertimmer
    edited January 2015 Posts: 4,622
    I can bitch here, with no bitching back, Awesome.

    CR is soap-opera Bond on steroids.
    QoS is a marxist manifesto.
    SF is all about mommy, mommy, mommy.

    OK I'm done. That felt good!

    But.....there may be hope for SP. :)
  • Some_Kind_Of_HeroSome_Kind_Of_Hero
    Posts: 6,844
    Ottofuse8 wrote: »
    Agent007391 wrote: »
    F*cking TWINE. Dear God... How can anyone like that movie? The villain is so painfully obvious, and nobody suspects it except Bond, who then drops it two seconds later, and picks it back up again five minutes after that. And then you've got Renard, the man who winces more than once in the film, despite not being able to feel pain! Who's the obvious traitor in Zukovsky's casino? The guy with all the f*cking gold on him! Every bloody thing in the film was so obvious, and nobody ever seemed to realize it! Christ, I hate TWINE!

    TWINE is easily top ten for me. Slightly Over complicated but compelling story, great villain, great action, great locations.

    Oh I agree absolutely, loads to love in TWINE, but this is a negativity thread so let's keep an eye on the positive thinking. ;)
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    Yes - no positive comments pleas - keep it down beat.
  • BAIN123BAIN123
    Posts: 11,189
    I'm not a massive fan of QoS. Not the worst but I find it pretty dull.
  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    BAIN123 wrote: »
    I'm not a massive fan of QoS. Not the worst but I find it pretty dull.

    Surely you can do better than that. "QoS is the worst thing to ever happen to cinema!!!" Is the tone we're looking for. One half of @JamesBondRadio wrote a very lengthy screed on QoS that earned him a cease and desist order ;)
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    BAIN123 wrote: »
    I'm not a massive fan of QoS. Not the worst but I find it pretty dull.

    Come on - you can be more negative than that, surely!
  • BAIN123BAIN123
    Posts: 11,189
    Alrite. It's crap and tedious :p
  • GetafixGetafix
    Posts: 11,425
    That's more like it!
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    Posts: 12,480
    Teri Hatcher set Bond girls back ten years and managed to damp down an exciting film every time she was in a scene. When Monica was recently announced as cast, I somehow feel that Teri got a quiet invisible kick in her rear end. And deservedly so.

    Denise Richards proved she cannot act and that having a nuclear scientist be merely eye candy and near bimbo level dragged down an already choppy and melodramatic script. If she had been cast working in a skimpy outfit in Valentin's caviar factory, then that would have been at least appropriate. But not a main Bond girl. One of the worst.
  • doubleohdaddoubleohdad
    Posts: 1,146
    Getafix wrote: »
    BAIN123 wrote: »
    I'm not a massive fan of QoS. Not the worst but I find it pretty dull.

    Come on - you can be more negative than that, surely!

    I can do it!

    I'd rather watch QoS than any of the Moore, Dalton and Broz films.
  • GetafixGetafix
    edited January 2015 Posts: 11,425
    I sensed the heavy hand of the studio over the entire Brosnan era. From the departure of Dalton, to the generally dreadful title songs, and imposition of lame actresses like Hatcher, Richards and the supposedly talented Berry, Brosnan's films feel like they've been assembled from a kit of parts delivered through the post.
  • andmcitandmcit
    Posts: 1,068
    I just don't get SF at all nor the intense love for it - really I don't.

    Bond founders around all macho in it like some Duracell bunny always on the go but is embarrassingly useless in any effectiveness in the delivery of his duties and badly fails in the key task of protecting M.

    This is the first ever incident in the series, reboot or not, of this level of professional incompetence unless you're counting Tracy or Vesper which are personal failures.

    This is the guy that on other days saves the whole world from meltdown countless times without breaking a single fingernail ffs!!

    The supporting key players in MI6 were having a bad day at the office too and should all be put on suspension pending an enquiry into how the head of a key government security and protection agency can be permitted to die in a chapel in the back of beyond in Scotland with only one guy to protect them where there are legions of trusted personnel in the armed forces etc who wouldn't be remotely sympathetic to Silva.

    Even in his ineptitude Jonny English (never watched it I may add but know the character) manages to bumble the right end results but in SF Bond doesn't. He's a washout.
  • doubleohdaddoubleohdad
    Posts: 1,146
    Well, much of the stuff you mention comes from direction, and the three directors after Campbell were just bloody awful, in all honesty. Listen to the Apted Commentary on TWINE. He talks about how the audience reaction to the PTS made it clear that the Bilbao stuff was not 'big' enough an opening, so he editorially shifted the credits and song to after the Themes sequence (which is mediocre and looks like it was guided by the stunt people instead of the director) which bring up the basic point of how do you not know your story well enough to be able to judge something like that from the get-go? BEcause a strong director would know that from just reading the script.

    Diabolical.
  • JohnBarryFanJohnBarryFan
    Posts: 1,405
    Marc Forster is defintely by far the worst thing that ever happened to Bond.
    Grace Jones, the Tarzan yell, the continuity problem from YOLT and OHMSS, the CGI surfing sequence from DAD...they all pale before the wrecking ball performance of Marc Forster.

    I was soooooooo expecting a tremendous follow-up after CR and what have I got?
    Shaky camera and roller-derby like editing. How can anyone enjoy a movie when you can't make heads or tails of any action sequences? Simply put, had SF been directed by Forster, I think I woudn't be here.

    PLEASE MARC FORSTER, STAY AWAY FROM BOND.
  • doubleohdaddoubleohdad
    Posts: 1,146
    I disagree to an extent. There are elements in QOS that seem like strange decisions, but I overall like the picture and think it's far better directed than the last three Broz films. The action stuff is absolutely fantastic to me in QOS, but the story runs out of story, and the end is made anticlimactic by a weak final confrontation. DOn't think that a country running out of water creates as much global jeopardy than say, funding terrorism if a card game is lost.
  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    Why the f*ck does anybody like GF? Such a boring film, Bond is stuck for 50% of it, and Goldfinger is a piss-poor villain. Stupid f*cking movie.
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    Posts: 23,883
    Getafix wrote: »
    I sensed the heavy hand of the studio over the entire Brosnan era. From the departure of Dalton, to the generally dreadful title songs, and imposition of lame actresses like Hatcher, Richards and the supposedly talented Berry, Brosnan's films feel like they've been assembled from a kit of parts delivered through the post.

    I think you're correct here. If I'm not mistaken, MGM head honchos had EON over a barrel with casting and other decisions during this time as they were all on the verge of financial collapse. Only once Sony came into the picture and new funding was secured, could a new direction/path be forged with CR.
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