Worst Lines in All of Bond

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  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    Jinx "your momma, and she told me to tell you she's quite dissapointed at you." Jesus christ, what a crap of dialogue!
    It's still amazing that after DAD was released P&W weren't chased thru the streets and torn apart by a baying mob like Indian villagers chasing someone accused of killing a cow.

    I think an improvement could have been if he deadpanned with a solemn face "my mother's dead" in response.
  • BondJasonBond006BondJasonBond006 on fb and ajb
    Posts: 9,020
    Sark wrote: »
    Jinx "your momma, and she told me to tell you she's quite dissapointed at you." Jesus christ, what a crap of dialogue!
    It's still amazing that after DAD was released P&W weren't chased thru the streets and torn apart by a baying mob like Indian villagers chasing someone accused of killing a cow.

    I think an improvement could have been if he deadpanned with a solemn face "my mother's dead" in response.

    That phrase got a lot of laughter in the cinema, and the reason no-one wanted to chase P+W down the streets is because the general audience LOVED Die Another Day back then.
  • Posts: 15,106
    BAIN123 wrote: »
    Ludovico wrote: »
    Dragonpol wrote: »
    Tiffany Case to kid in DAF: "Blow up your pants"

    It's not so much that the line is bad as it is crass. Tiffany Case in the movie is so darn crass and vulgar.

    I can't stand her in the second half of the film, but in the first half I quite like her. She's the least irritating out of all the airheads that appeared during that period. (Rosie, Tiffany and Mary Goodnight).

    One thing I can't get my head round is Timothy Dalton describing her as "wonderful" in a 1989 interview.

    She was very poorly written and she lacked class. At least however stupid was Goodnight she looked somewhat classy.
  • SirHilaryBraySirHilaryBray Scotland
    Posts: 2,138
    On reflection I have come to the conclusion Dalton was a tremendous Bond. Let down by a poor supporting cast and a poor script on LTK. I oddly feel the same about DAF. I think find the GF scenes of Bond being held prisoner at the ranch a troff in the film. I came to the conclusion Bond in the USA doesn't work. He always seems to be in the CIA'S pocket which restricts him when he's at his best causing carnage and flying solo. LALD scenes in NYC are the only exclusion to the above.
  • edited October 2015 Posts: 11,189
    Sark wrote: »
    Jinx "your momma, and she told me to tell you she's quite dissapointed at you." Jesus christ, what a crap of dialogue!
    It's still amazing that after DAD was released P&W weren't chased thru the streets and torn apart by a baying mob like Indian villagers chasing someone accused of killing a cow.

    I think an improvement could have been if he deadpanned with a solemn face "my mother's dead" in response.

    That phrase got a lot of laughter in the cinema, and the reason no-one wanted to chase P+W down the streets is because the general audience LOVED Die Another Day back then.

    I'll agree it did extremely well financially but I wonder whether "loved" may have been a bit of an exaggeration. Granted most of the reviews were fairly decent and I actually enjoyed it too at the time, but I can think of two people straight away that I talked to soon afterwards who thought it was disappointing and even my best friend said the effects were laughable.
  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    The sheen came off DAD fairly quickly. Certainly within a year it was being widely mocked. And it ended Brosnan's tenure shortly thereafter.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    edited October 2015 Posts: 15,423
    Shortly thereafter? I believe that's a bit too premature statement. A well-renowned company like Electronic Arts called the man in late 2003 to come over and provide his vocal talents to the Bond character in a highly praised video game, officially released in Spring 2004.
  • MajorDSmytheMajorDSmythe "I tolerate this century, but I don't enjoy it."Moderator
    Posts: 13,978
    "You're not going to let me back in there, you've got you armour back on." / "I have no armour left. You've stripped it from me. Whatever is left of me - whatever is left of me - whatever I am - I'm yours."

    An exchange so saccharine, i'm feeling sick just thinking about it. I hated that exchange in the trailer(s), I hated it on the big screen, and here, 9 years on, it certainly hasn't gotten better with age.
  • edited October 2015 Posts: 11,189
    There are certain lines used in Bond that have been in other films since and feel clichéd n themselves.

    I watched Batman Forever for the first time in years the other day and, at one point, Nicole Kidman says to Batman: "I wish I could say my interest in you was...purely professional".

    Also, I was watching a trailer the other day (tho annoyingly I cant remember the film) and I had a sense of deja-vu when I heard the line:

    "you only have one shot...make it count"

    Also, there was Skyfall's line of "a storm's coming". I remember first hearing that metaphor in The Terminator.
  • edited October 2015 Posts: 11,189
    On reflection I have come to the conclusion Dalton was a tremendous Bond. Let down by a poor supporting cast and a poor script on LTK. I oddly feel the same about DAF. I think find the GF scenes of Bond being held prisoner at the ranch a troff in the film. I came to the conclusion Bond in the USA doesn't work. He always seems to be in the CIA'S pocket which restricts him when he's at his best causing carnage and flying solo. LALD scenes in NYC are the only exclusion to the above.

    didn't you say that your wife ruined the Dalton era for you by pointing out the flaws in his performance?

    Dalton was a decent bond but Craig takes things further IMO.
  • edited October 2015 Posts: 2,483
    "You're not going to let me back in there, you've got you armour back on." / "I have no armour left. You've stripped it from me. Whatever is left of me - whatever is left of me - whatever I am - I'm yours."

    An exchange so saccharine, i'm feeling sick just thinking about it. I hated that exchange in the trailer(s), I hated it on the big screen, and here, 9 years on, it certainly hasn't gotten better with age.

    Couldn't agree more. I don't think there is an instance in all of Bond of greater disparity between the overall quality of the film (CR) and certain lines within it (post-ball bashing sequence) than this one.

  • mcdonbbmcdonbb deep in the Heart of Texas
    Posts: 4,116
    Sark wrote: »
    Jinx "your momma, and she told me to tell you she's quite dissapointed at you." Jesus christ, what a crap of dialogue!
    It's still amazing that after DAD was released P&W weren't chased thru the streets and torn apart by a baying mob like Indian villagers chasing someone accused of killing a cow.

    I think an improvement could have been if he deadpanned with a solemn face "my mother's dead" in response.

    That phrase got a lot of laughter in the cinema, and the reason no-one wanted to chase P+W down the streets is because the general audience LOVED Die Another Day back then.

    Yeah that was recent post 911; we didn't want serious back then. People forget that when assessing DAD overall.

  • SirHilaryBraySirHilaryBray Scotland
    Posts: 2,138
    BAIN123 wrote: »
    On reflection I have come to the conclusion Dalton was a tremendous Bond. Let down by a poor supporting cast and a poor script on LTK. I oddly feel the same about DAF. I think find the GF scenes of Bond being held prisoner at the ranch a troff in the film. I came to the conclusion Bond in the USA doesn't work. He always seems to be in the CIA'S pocket which restricts him when he's at his best causing carnage and flying solo. LALD scenes in NYC are the only exclusion to the above.

    didn't you say that your wife ruined the Dalton era for you by pointing out the flaws in his performance?

    Dalton was a decent bond but Craig takes things further IMO.

    She did. But I don't agree with her. I hate the end of the PTS with the "I wish I could find a real man" Bond then landing his parachutte on the roof. It's bad really awful. But Dalton had real stature. He was better in TLD than LTK.
  • pachazopachazo Make Your Choice
    Posts: 7,314
    "It's something we're developing for the Americans, it's called the Ghetto Blaster" 1. Why would the British Secret Service be developing weapons for American, the munitions capital of the world. 2. Are they planning on using it on LA gangs lol. Love Q scenes but it's painful to watch.
    I always got the impression that the Americans asked for his help, considering that he was the tech master. Maybe it's a stretch but why not learn from the best?
  • Posts: 250
    royale65 wrote: »
    Eve - " It's some kind of sadistic game"

    I thought that one was going to get ripped on here.

    Agreed - it'd be better if it was just "They're playing a sadistic game" or something.
  • edited October 2015 Posts: 352
    "Yo mama" and "Read This, Bitch!"
    Jinx, Die Another Day
  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    Shortly thereafter? I believe that's a bit too premature statement. A well-renowned company like Electronic Arts called the man in late 2003 to come over and provide his vocal talents to the Bond character in a highly praised video game, officially released in Spring 2004.

    I'm honestly not sure what this had to do with DAD losing its appeal. Brosnan was still Bond at that time, of course he was recruited to voice Bond in a video game. It doesn't have anything to do with how much people liked DAD. It was less than two years after DAD mad a record amount of money for EON that they unceremoniously fired Pierce, so I think 2 years is the absolute outside we can give for how long it took people to turn on DAD>\.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    edited October 2015 Posts: 15,423
    Sark wrote: »
    Shortly thereafter? I believe that's a bit too premature statement. A well-renowned company like Electronic Arts called the man in late 2003 to come over and provide his vocal talents to the Bond character in a highly praised video game, officially released in Spring 2004.

    I'm honestly not sure what this had to do with DAD losing its appeal. Brosnan was still Bond at that time, of course he was recruited to voice Bond in a video game. It doesn't have anything to do with how much people liked DAD. It was less than two years after DAD mad a record amount of money for EON that they unceremoniously fired Pierce, so I think 2 years is the absolute outside we can give for how long it took people to turn on DAD>\.
    I was actually referring to his tenure and immediate rejection as believed by some of the fans. No, DAD wasn't what I was speaking of. But, yes, after a year it has been losing its appeal in the eyes of the public in general. Brosnan, however, wasn't.
  • BondJasonBond006BondJasonBond006 on fb and ajb
    Posts: 9,020
    Brosnan wasn't fired. That's what his haters would like to make us believe.

    There was no contract.

    BB + MGW decided to go a different direction which had a lot to do with CR finally being available to do and 9/11. They say so themselves in Everything Or Nothing, the documentary.

    DAD lost its appeal probably around 2005/2006 when Hollywood "suddenly" made completely different action movies (the Nolan/Bourne effect).
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,244
    Brosnan wasn't fired. That's what his haters would like to make us believe.

    There was no contract.

    BB + MGW decided to go a different direction which had a lot to do with CR finally being available to do and 9/11. They say so themselves in Everything Or Nothing, the documentary.

    DAD lost its appeal probably around 2005/2006 when Hollywood "suddenly" made completely different action movies (the Nolan/Bourne effect).

    He wasn't under contract but he did say he wanted to do another one, and had no real reason to believe they wouldn't contact him for it. Sure they had no obligation to consider him through contracts, but, in social habits, it would've been nice of them to at least be more in contact.

    The Bourne/Nolan films were attesting to their times. After 911 there was a war threat, and in 2002 an economic crisis. Over the top just didn't fit in anymore. DAD was basically released just after it's proper time.

    Still, it took ott to higher levels then ever before except the seventies.

  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    The Bourne Identity was released in 2002(and was commonly acclaimed as a "Bond-killer" at the time), so it's complete nonsense that people only wanted "lighter" films like DAD.

    No, Brosnan wasn't fired teachnically. But if I want to renew my contract and my company doesn't offer, I will for all intents and purposes be fired.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    edited October 2015 Posts: 15,423
    xXx with Vin Diesel (the acclaimed film which is) was also released in 2002, and Bourne wasn't established with the genre in its entirely just yet for people to "want more films like that". That kind of theme didn't gain full popularization until 2004/2005 like Jason said above.
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,244
    Sark wrote: »
    The Bourne Identity was released in 2002(and was commonly acclaimed as a "Bond-killer" at the time), so it's complete nonsense that people only wanted "lighter" films like DAD.

    No, Brosnan wasn't fired teachnically. But if I want to renew my contract and my company doesn't offer, I will for all intents and purposes be fired.

    As I said, DAD was too late. Before 911 films were lighter. Bourne was right on the mark. Don't forget that the late nineties the Western world was thinking it was invincible (and apparently invisible). Fukuyama's The End of History and the Last Man' was still acclaimed as the political and historical truth. Allthough some people may have seen the misery coming, most were still only obsessed with how well things were going. Sotckmarkets that would never come down again, all that sort of... misunderstandings. That's when DAD was conceived. When it was born however, 'the world had changed'.

  • "VW Beetles... I think"
    Moneypenny, Skyfall
  • MajorDSmytheMajorDSmythe "I tolerate this century, but I don't enjoy it."Moderator
    Posts: 13,978
    "VW Beetles... I think"
    Moneypenny, Skyfall

    I'm surprised that Moneypenny didn't tell us more. It's a VW Bettle, but what's the starting price, and what extras can we have? If they're used, what are the service histories like? Come on Eve, don't keep us waiting.
  • SirHilaryBraySirHilaryBray Scotland
    edited October 2015 Posts: 2,138
    "VW Beetles... I think"
    Moneypenny, Skyfall

    I'm surprised that Moneypenny didn't tell us more. It's a VW Bettle, but what's the starting price, and what extras can we have? If they're used, what are the service histories like? Come on Eve, don't keep us waiting.

    Not convinced yet about Harris. I hope Spectre changes my mind. I really dislike the way the scene is delivered by both Dan and Harris at the end of Skyfall "You know, I don't believe we've been formally introduced" "My names Eve, Eve Moneypenny"

    Harris seems to mutter it, the pause is un-natural. I don't know why that take got in. Craig saves it with the look and the follow up "Well I shall enjoy our time together...Ms Moneypenny"

    So this woman shoots Bond, goes to Macau to shave Bonds face and he doesn't say so what's your name?

    Chemistry seems wrong, I really hope the flirting between them in Spectre is more natural.
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    Posts: 23,883
    "VW Beetles... I think"
    Moneypenny, Skyfall

    I'm surprised that Moneypenny didn't tell us more. It's a VW Bettle, but what's the starting price, and what extras can we have? If they're used, what are the service histories like? Come on Eve, don't keep us waiting.

    Not convinced yet about Harris. I hope Spectre changes my mind. I really dislike the way the scene is delivered by both Dan and Harris at the end of Skyfall "You know, I don't believe we've been formally introduced" "My names Eve, Eve Moneypenny"

    Harris seems to mutter it, the pause is un-natural. I don't know why that take got in. Craig saves it with the look and the follow up "Well I shall enjoy our time together...Ms Moneypenny"

    So this woman shoots Bond, goes to Macau to shave Bonds face and he doesn't say so what's your name?

    Chemistry seems wrong, I really hope the flirting between them in Spectre is more natural.
    100% agree. Poor casting to 'tick a box' imho. I too hope for an improvement in this film (although her spoken words in the trailers leave something to be desired) or else I'm open to a recasting post-Mendes.
  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    Is that terrible because of the product placement? If so, "Rolex?" "Omega" "[sarcastically]beautiful" would certainly take the cake. But it's nowhere near as bad as many lines mentioned ITT which are terrible of their own accord.
  • ForYourEyesOnlyForYourEyesOnly In the untained cradle of the heavens
    Posts: 1,984
    "I'll buy you a delicatessen in stainless steel" LOL.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    I hate the " I can't find the stationery ...." Line in QOS, just felt so
    Wooden. He may as well gone full Austin Powers and say " Will
    We shag now, or later" :))
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