And the Klebbie goes to...Worst execution of a good idea page 147

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  • PrinceKamalKhanPrinceKamalKhan Monsoon Palace, Udaipur
    edited July 2020 Posts: 3,262
    As fond as I am of Maria Grazia Cucinotta my vote goes to the sole Brosnan-era nominee in this category:

    Bond chases Cigar girl down the Thames from TWINE


    P.S. I rather enjoy the boat chases myself. I love both the MR ones. In fact I would say the Amazon boat chase, followed by Bond's hang glider escape, his spotting the Venini glass receptionist by the falls, her luring him to the pyramid, the arrival of the remaining angels of death, I mean Drax's girls, Bond's falling into the pond, and battling the python constitute my favorite 7 1/2 minutes of the Moore era. A good example of pure cinema. No dialogue but every thing being communicated perfectly to the viewer via picture and sound(John Barry's magnificent score):


    thedove wrote: »
    Here are the nominees:
    • Students chase Bond through the rivers of Asia from TMWTGG
    • Bond chases Cigar girl down the Thames from TWINE
    • Jaws chases Bond through the rivers of Brazil from MR
    • Bond escapes on the Bayou for a long, long time from LALD
    • A gondola race in Venice leaves some doing a double take from MR

    @thedove Could we also have a round where these 5 contenders compete for the title of best boat chase, please?
  • CraigMooreOHMSSCraigMooreOHMSS Dublin, Ireland
    Posts: 8,216
    The Gondola chase from MR it is; it lacks excitement and it isn't funny enough to offset its ludicrousness.
  • The ludicrous kids of the boat chase in TMWTGG seal the deal for me. From the kung fu school girls at the beginning of that sequence (they drive off leaving Bond to escape by boat? Really??) to the saleskid that Bond owes 20,000 baht for "fixing" his fuel supply on the boat ("Bloody tourist!") this one is by far my least favorite boat chase.
  • R1s1ngs0nR1s1ngs0n France
    Posts: 2,147
    I love LALD and think it’s Moore’s best outing by far. But it could have been even better if not for that overlong and not very exciting boat chase. LALD gets my vote.
  • Posts: 928
    I think they're all these sequences are pretty good, but LALD's bayou chase could've used a little extra kick and music.
  • Posts: 631
    I’m probably a bit of a lone voice here but I love the LALD chase and I do not think it is too long at all. It’s better to stop thinking of it as just a single chase but instead think of it in other terms, as a scene or an act perhaps, which contains numerous individual chases. It is almost a film within a film, with its own storyline and characters, but instead of being a story set in a static setting it is a story set on moving speedboats. I have never seen anything else like it, although Mad Max’s chases come close. They are set on land though.

    Anyway, back on topic. The worst is TMWTGG’s chase in Thailand. It is an atrocity.

    MR’s Amazon chase is beautifully filmed. It is so nice to see proper explosive charges detonating, creating real columns of water, and boats going through them. It would all be CGI today.
  • edited July 2020 Posts: 7,507
    TMWTGG for sure! How could there be a contest?? It all starts off with the karate nerds driving off without Bond for no reason, then UNICEF ambassador Roger Moore pushes a boy in the water and an elephant does the same with Pepper. Yikes! It is the worst scene in the film and possibly in all of Bond!

    I quite enjoy all of the other ones to be honest.
  • thedovethedove hiding in the Greek underworld
    Posts: 5,416
    I have learned to respect royalty @PrinceKamalKhan so I think it's a capital idea. Though I will remove the one voted worst and insert one that didn't get included in this round. ;)
  • FatherValentineFatherValentine England
    Posts: 737
    I looked at the title for this Klebbie and rolled my eyes. My first thought was - 'what's the point of this poll? It is clear that QoS is going to come top'. Imagine my surprise when I found out it's not even included.

    TWINE is the best one. I saw LALD at a cinema relatively recently, and it really dragged. Top stunts, but it doesn't zip anymore.

    Clearly QoS is the worst. It makes no sense. No matter how many times I watch it I can't work out how it finishes where it does. It's rotten.

  • mtmmtm United Kingdom
    edited July 2020 Posts: 16,359
    Heh! That's quite a fun category. I must say you're probably right in that none of them are great; the best on the list is probably LALD and that does indeed go on forever. Bond even gets himself a new boat halfway through- that's how long it lasts!

    I'm going to go with the TMWTGG one though, as I can't really think of anything it adds to anything... it's just sort of there. Yes, I know the MR Venice one actually just does the cutting-a-boat-in-half gag again (which is kind of shocking), but I can't deny I actually find that one kind of exciting. Bond leans forward, pushes the joystick, the Bond theme cuts in... it's quite good :)
    The TWINE one is very episodic rather than a flowing sequence, but it's spectacular enough. MR in Brazil I quite like just because of the sheer size and power of Bond's boat, plus those mines are really powerful and impressive and pretty great to watch, and it's really over before it outstays its welcome, plus the hang-glider gag isn't bad at all. Actually, it's also rather lovely to look at with all of those aerial shots, and the music is nice too.
  • mtmmtm United Kingdom
    edited July 2020 Posts: 16,359
    The ludicrous kids of the boat chase in TMWTGG seal the deal for me. From the kung fu school girls at the beginning of that sequence (they drive off leaving Bond to escape by boat? Really??) to the saleskid that Bond owes 20,000 baht for "fixing" his fuel supply on the boat ("Bloody tourist!") this one is by far my least favorite boat chase.

    I don't mind the kid so much as that's a fairly original gag and it works, but the whole bit about Hip and his nieces forgetting Bond is one of the worst scripted moments in any Bond film. It's just... crap. They couldn't write a better excuse for an action scene?

    And lest we forget it ends with this guy...

    62f881edd4e8de2f81f3821c8312e085.png

    It does start with a very rare shot of Roger running though: and you can see why he refused to do it on screen for the most part. He does have a very funny run! :)
  • CraigMooreOHMSSCraigMooreOHMSS Dublin, Ireland
    Posts: 8,216
    mtm wrote: »
    And lest we forget it ends with this guy...

    62f881edd4e8de2f81f3821c8312e085.png

    The Jar Jar Binks of the Bond movies.
  • mtm wrote: »
    And lest we forget it ends with this guy...

    62f881edd4e8de2f81f3821c8312e085.png

    The Jar Jar Binks of the Bond movies.

    Sheriff J.W. Pepper works for LALD -- he has a reason to be there, it's his parish, and quite frankly, this storyline needs to portray some white racism -- but he doesn't really belong in TMWTGG. We can't actually believe that he'd go vacationing in SE Asia. His presence in this scene is another reason why this sequence deserves the Klebbie.
  • echoecho 007 in New York
    Posts: 6,287
    Another write-in for QoS.
  • BennyBenny Shaken not stirredAdministrator, Moderator
    Posts: 15,132
    There's a few entries here that could easily take this. The gondola chase in MR, whilst the over the top nature of it fits the film, it's just a little too silly with a gadget laden gondola that we're not privy to knowing what it can do.
    One of the more fan liked boat chases of the series, is one that I find a bit...meh!
    The TWINE chase down the Thames. It does have moments of excitement, but is overly long. Camera rigs and stuntmen are clearly noticeable at times, and the less said about the boats ability to drive on the streets of London and through a restaurant, the better.
    But the winner has to be the boat chase down the Klong's of Bangkok in TMWTGG.
    The poorly scripted set up for the scene, where Hip leaves Bond to fend for himself as he speeds off in his car. As his nieces protest, why did Hip not simply stop his car allowing Bond to get in?
    Then we have the way Bond stops the karate school attackers from taking him on, by waving the long propeller shaft back and forth. Surely one of the group could've made an attempt to get in the boat at this time. Certainly they could of, as Bond drops the propeller into the water to make his escape. Whilst it's not the worst concept, I do wonder why Bond couldn't see or workout that the fuel line was turned off, when the boat loses power. And finally the breaking the boat in half, which is clearly breaking, before Bond hits it, and the inclusion of Sheriff JW Pepper turning up in Bangkok observing Bond in action, once again. All in all, a poorly conceived and played out Bond chase, that ultimately doesn't add anything to the story. Bizarre!
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    MR it is for me, on the basis that I can't remember it as much as the others, which I have no problems with.
    @Mathis1 are you sure you aren't just talking about the TWINE PTS in general? :P

    But which one? If you mean the Venice chase, then +1.

    The one in Brazil I love.
  • NickTwentyTwoNickTwentyTwo Vancouver, BC, Canada
    Posts: 7,546
    MR it is for me, on the basis that I can't remember it as much as the others, which I have no problems with.
    @Mathis1 are you sure you aren't just talking about the TWINE PTS in general? :P

    But which one? If you mean the Venice chase, then +1.

    The one in Brazil I love.

    Actually yeah, I do like all the Brazil stuff in MR.
  • LeonardPineLeonardPine The Bar on the Beach
    Posts: 3,996
    The Gondola chase from MR gets my vote. The low point of the series for me, even though i like MR a lot. I always 'edit' that scene out when i watch it. It's such an unneccesary and pointless sequence.
  • LocqueLocque Escaped from a Namur prison
    Posts: 262
    LALD goes on too long and the “funny” interruptions by sheriff Pepper sap the flow and pace.
  • M_BaljeM_Balje Amsterdam, Netherlands
    Posts: 4,513
    A gondola race in Venice leaves some doing a double take from MR.
  • OctopussyOctopussy Piz Gloria, Schilthorn, Switzerland.
    Posts: 1,081
    M_Balje wrote: »
    A gondola race in Venice leaves some doing a double take from MR.

    +1
  • Max_The_ParrotMax_The_Parrot ATAC to St Cyril’s
    edited July 2020 Posts: 2,426
    Despite my love of all things MR including my love of the Bondola and the Bondola chase, I would have to reluctantly agree it’s probably most worthy of the DRP vote *this is a sad day*
  • edited July 2020 Posts: 1,009
    The TMWTGG marks the low point of one of my fav Bond films. A UNICEF goodwill ambassador throwing a child into a REAL LIFE polluted canal with corpses rotting at its bottom :-& A filthy scene.
  • ProfJoeButcherProfJoeButcher Bless your heart
    Posts: 1,711
    TWINE. It doesn't do its job as a PTS. You just keep wondering when the titles are finally going to start.
  • GadgetManGadgetMan Lagos, Nigeria
    edited July 2020 Posts: 4,247
    The TMWTGG marks the low point of one of my fav Bond films. An UNICEF goodwill ambassador throwing a child into a REAL LIFE polluted canal with corpses rotting at its bottom :-& A filthy scene.

    Yeah, I think in retrospect, Moore himself felt bad about that. It's funny, TMWTGG is often considered a silly Bond film, but there are scenes in there where Moore's Bond is Brutal....Another example, is when he's roughing up Maud Adams.
  • mtmmtm United Kingdom
    Posts: 16,359
    The TMWTGG marks the low point of one of my fav Bond films. An UNICEF goodwill ambassador throwing a child into a REAL LIFE polluted canal with corpses rotting at its bottom :-& A filthy scene.

    Haha! Ugh, that's a great way of putting it :D
    I guess to be fair the kid had already just swam out of the canal!

    It does make me wonder why they put a boat chase in this film, considering audiences had watched Roger having another massive boat chase in cinemas only a few months before! Some of the camera angles even make it look the same.
  • Posts: 7,414
    MR it is for me, on the basis that I can't remember it as much as the others, which I have no problems with.
    @Mathis1 are you sure you aren't just talking about the TWINE PTS in general? :P

    No, am talking about the chase itself, find it very poor, and just never seems to end!
  • Last_Rat_StandingLast_Rat_Standing Long Neck Ice Cold Beer Never Broke My Heart
    Posts: 4,581
    TMWTGG canal chase. I enjoy the other 4.
  • edited July 2020 Posts: 1,009
    GadgetMan wrote: »
    The TMWTGG marks the low point of one of my fav Bond films. An UNICEF goodwill ambassador throwing a child into a REAL LIFE polluted canal with corpses rotting at its bottom :-& A filthy scene.

    Yeah, I think in retrospect, Moore himself felt bad about that. It's funny, TMWTGG is often considered a silly Bond film, but there are scenes in there where Moore's Bond is Brutal....Another example, is when he's roughing up Maud Adams.

    Yes, he said it on the commentary track.
    About Maud's thing, Moore said it, too. Both scenes would have worked with Connery, but with Moore... He really looks unconfortable.
  • mtmmtm United Kingdom
    edited July 2020 Posts: 16,359
    Yeah Guy Hamilton never quite got him right.

    I do quite enjoy the scene where he makes Britt Ekland listen to him shagging Maud Adams for a couple of hours, possibly as punishment for daring to rebuff his advances earlier in the evening. It's so weird! :D
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