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Bond movies' Worst quotes ever

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  • battleshipgreygtbattleshipgreygt
    Posts: 1,220
    To me the worst lines have to be basically anything from Die Another Day, "This never happened to the other fella.", and Roger Moore's "My name is Bond, James Bond."
  • 00Beast00Beast
    Posts: 4,762
    battleshipgreygt wrote:
    To me the worst lines have to be basically anything from Die Another Day, "This never happened to the other fella.", and Roger Moore's "My name is Bond, James Bond."

    NO!! Roger's "Bond, James Bond" is simply too incredible for words to describe. What about it do you not like?
  • battleshipgreygtbattleshipgreygt
    Posts: 1,220
    00Beast wrote:
    battleshipgreygt wrote:
    To me the worst lines have to be basically anything from Die Another Day, "This never happened to the other fella.", and Roger Moore's "My name is Bond, James Bond."

    NO!! Roger's "Bond, James Bond" is simply too incredible for words to describe. What about it do you not like?

    I really don't know how to describe it, but it just comes across as a little unnatural and really just cheesy.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    battleshipgreygt wrote:
    00Beast wrote:
    battleshipgreygt wrote:
    To me the worst lines have to be basically anything from Die Another Day, "This never happened to the other fella.", and Roger Moore's "My name is Bond, James Bond."

    NO!! Roger's "Bond, James Bond" is simply too incredible for words to describe. What about it do you not like?

    I really don't know how to describe it, but it just comes across as a little unnatural and really just cheesy.

    Roger Moore cheesy? NO WAY! *cough* *wink* *wink* *cough*
  • 007RogerMoore007RogerMoore
    Posts: 1,082
    battleshipgreygt wrote:
    To me the worst lines have to be basically anything from Die Another Day, "This never happened to the other fella.", and Roger Moore's "My name is Bond, James Bond."

    There might be some bad lines in DAD, but I can't come up with one now (and no, I don't dislike the funny lines that you others hate) and the other 2 that you mention are IMO top class. Roger Moore is not cheesy. He is mega ultra gamma super amazing, as is his "Bond, James Bond" line.

  • echoecho 007 in New York
    Posts: 6,304
    "You have a license to kill, not to break the traffic laws."
  • KerimKerim Istanbul Not Constantinople
    Posts: 2,629
    Just post the DAD script.

  • SuperheroSithSuperheroSith SE London
    Posts: 578
    Doesn't this already have a thread?
  • fire_and_icefire_and_ice
    Posts: 6,432
    Tiffany Case: "Go
    blow up your pants!"

    American bond girls get all the best lines.
  • SpectreNumberOneSpectreNumberOne
    edited December 2012 Posts: 129
    Worst line of recent films "That last hand, it nearly kill me!" CR just totally didn't fit in this movie.
  • Baltimore_007Baltimore_007
    Posts: 5,634
    'I was just out walking my rat and I seemed to have lost my way'

    'One of us smells like a tarts handkerchief'

    'No well dressed man should be without one'

    'Now you can tell about the one that got away'

    'You wouldn't happen to have a smaller piece of thread than that, someone appears to have stuck a knife in me'

    'Having trouble keeping it up Q'

    'Game set and match, hang on James'

    'My name is Dick Tracy, and you're still under arrest'

    'That is not the soap'

    'A woman...'

    'I discovered it had a crush on me'

    'Play it again Sam'

    'Very good Q, we must get them in the stores in time for Christmas'

    'Women drivers..'

    'No, to the nearest pharmacy'

    'You may need that to play with your asp'

    'Fill her up please'

    'So far I can't complain about the valet service'

    'No mam, I'm with the economy tour'

    'If you shoot me from over there, it won't look like a suicide'

    'They'll print anything these days'

    'Health and safety'

    'You meant nothing to me, one last screw'

    'He's branched off'

    'Call me Hilly..'

    'Maybe you should of been gift wrapped'

    'We've hit the rush hour'

    'I'm an early riser myself'

    'Get over here you golden crusted buffoon'

    'I give you very best duck'

    'I love an early morning ride'
  • FromCanadaWithLoveFromCanadaWithLove Canada
    Posts: 612
    "Uhh get your clothes on, and I'll buy you an ice cream."

    COME ON.
  • MrBrownMrBrown
    Posts: 202
    Kerim wrote:
    Just post the DAD script.

    Yep. That'd work.

    All of the dialogue on the train in CASINO ROYALE was particularly awful, especially that Omega plug.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    MrBrown wrote:
    Kerim wrote:
    Just post the DAD script.

    Yep. That'd work.

    All of the dialogue on the train in CASINO ROYALE was particularly awful, especially that Omega plug.
    Ha! That's the 2nd best scene of the entire franchise (the Tennyson scene in Skyfall tops it for me).
  • JWESTBROOKJWESTBROOK
    Posts: 5,745
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote:
    MrBrown wrote:
    Kerim wrote:
    Just post the DAD script.

    Yep. That'd work.

    All of the dialogue on the train in CASINO ROYALE was particularly awful, especially that Omega plug.
    Ha! That's the 2nd best scene of the entire franchise (the Tennyson scene in Skyfall tops it for me).

    Subjectively of course. I'm assuming we all know that was subjective.

    Just making sure nothing starts.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    JWESTBROOK wrote:
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote:
    MrBrown wrote:
    Kerim wrote:
    Just post the DAD script.

    Yep. That'd work.

    All of the dialogue on the train in CASINO ROYALE was particularly awful, especially that Omega plug.
    Ha! That's the 2nd best scene of the entire franchise (the Tennyson scene in Skyfall tops it for me).

    Subjectively of course. I'm assuming we all know that was subjective.

    Just making sure nothing starts.

    Uh...obviously...
  • X3MSonicXX3MSonicX https://www.behance.net/gallery/86760163/Fa-Posteres-de-007-No-Time-To-Die
    Posts: 2,635
    I also think that the CR train scene is great. I love how Vesper starts that woman dressing and behaviour subject and Bond continues arguing with that, it's fantastic. one of my favourite parts of the film.
  • ReganRegan
    Posts: 173
    The train conversation in general was awesome, the omega plug was cringe-worthy, though.
  • JohnBarryFanJohnBarryFan
    edited December 2012 Posts: 1,405
    mrhatsuka wrote:
    DCisared wrote:
    DAD- " they feast , like there's no tomorrow" in fact that whole bloody converstaion between bond and jinx

    In fact any conversation with Bond and Jinx!

    The whole wretched conversation at the Cuban beach bar was especially pathetic. How could an actor like Pierce Brosnan accepted to deliver those lines is beyond comprehension.

  • MalloryMallory
    Posts: 2,165
    One of the worst puns, for me is:

    The Aston Martin cuts a police car in half with a laser beam.

    Kara: What was that?

    Bond: Salt corrosion.

    :-q
  • Baltimore_007Baltimore_007
    Posts: 5,634
    Yes, forgot about that. Don't think humor was really Dalton's forte

    'Are you calling me a horses ass' was another that didn't quite work, or "he got the boot" when Necros fell from the cargo plane

    As @JohnBarryFan said so himself, the awful conversation with Brosnan and Berry and the Cuban beach resort. "Ornithologist huh - that's a mouthful"

    Others I could of mentioned -

    "He had to fly" - Goodhead asks Bond where Drax went to

    The "put your clothes on - and I'll buy you an Ice-cream" as mentioned before

    "All those feathers and he still can't fly" - The Spy Who Loved Me

    "I'll do anything for a woman with a knife" - License to Kill

    "I suppose that depends on what weapon you're talking about disarming" - Goldeneye
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,585
    The line mentioned in the opening post, 'My name is Mr. Kil' might have worked better if he preceded or followed it up with another sentence. Perhaps "Welcome to Iceland, Mr Bond. My name is Mr. Kil." To which Bond could reply, "Mr. Kil, you say? I feel welcome already." Instead, we are left with a mere introduction- and nothing else, to which Bond should've said "Do I look like I give a damn?"
    Baltimore_007 wrote:
    Don't think humor was really Dalton's forte
    'Are you calling me a horses ass' was another that didn't quite work, or "he got the boot" when Necros fell from the cargo plane
    I thought that was simple and effective. Well executed- as there's no time for Kara or the viewer to react when Dalts spots the cliff up ahead halfway through speaking.
    Mallory wrote:
    One of the worst puns, for me is:
    The Aston Martin cuts a police car in half with a laser beam.
    Kara: What was that?
    Bond: Salt corrosion. :-q
    True, it never did much for me. It might've worked better if they were near the beach.
  • mdo007mdo007 Katy, Texas
    edited January 2013 Posts: 259
    I was rewatching Tomorrow never Dies, Bond said this in the PTS when he light one guard's cigarette then knock him down, he said this:

    "Filthy habit"

    This is coming out of the same person that smoke 50-60 cigarettes a day.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    mdo007 wrote:
    I was rewatching Tomorrow never Dies, Bond said this in the PTS when he light one guard's cigarette then knock him down, he said this:

    "Filthy habit"

    This is coming out of the same person that smoke 50-60 cigarettes a day.

    Not Brosnan's Bond though. The only time I can recall that he lit up was in DAD (a Cuban cigar).
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    edited January 2013 Posts: 14,585
    Ironically, the only thing that got lit up in TWINE was Bond's eyes when Moneypenny knew what to do with the cigar case! :))
  • mdo007mdo007 Katy, Texas
    Posts: 259
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote:
    mdo007 wrote:
    I was rewatching Tomorrow never Dies, Bond said this in the PTS when he light one guard's cigarette then knock him down, he said this:

    "Filthy habit"

    This is coming out of the same person that smoke 50-60 cigarettes a day.

    Not Brosnan's Bond though. The only time I can recall that he lit up was in DAD (a Cuban cigar).

    I know but any Bond nerd would find that line ridiculous because Bond before Brosnan (yeah we saw Sean Connery smoking when we first see him in DN) and in the book, Bond had a nasty smoking habit (he would smoke 50-70 cigarettes a day). That why I found that line just inconsistent and redundant not because Brosnan's Bond doesn't smoke in the movie.

  • Supes007Supes007
    Posts: 21
    I'll buy you a delicatessen made of steel.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    edited January 2013 Posts: 14,585
    mdo007 wrote:
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote:
    mdo007 wrote:
    I was rewatching Tomorrow never Dies, Bond said this in the PTS when he light one guard's cigarette then knock him down, he said this:

    "Filthy habit"

    This is coming out of the same person that smoke 50-60 cigarettes a day.

    Not Brosnan's Bond though. The only time I can recall that he lit up was in DAD (a Cuban cigar).
    I know but any Bond nerd would find that line ridiculous because Bond before Brosnan (yeah we saw Sean Connery smoking when we first see him in DN) and in the book, Bond had a nasty smoking habit (he would smoke 50-70 cigarettes a day). That why I found that line just inconsistent and redundant not because Brosnan's Bond doesn't smoke in the movie.
    True, it's inconsistent- but not unfamiliar to fans, as like Brozza, Moore's Bond hardly smoked throughout his lengthy tenure either- apart from a cigar or two when he's hang gliding and in the hotel in LALD, if I recall correctly. Then we see Dalts light up one cigarette after the other! When it comes to cinematic Bond, consistency goes up in smoke! (sorry about the pun)
  • AliAli
    Posts: 319
    Both the most cringeworthy, and funniest, of all the quotes for me: "A woman?"
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,585
    A fully trained astronaut who's also female? You must be joking?!
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