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Pitching Bond - How would you have done it?

Monsieur_AubergineMonsieur_Aubergine Top of the Eiffel Tower with a fly in my soup!
edited August 2012 in Bond Movies Posts: 642
The traditional movie pitch is a descriptive sentence on a piece of paper waved under the nose of studio exec. The purposes of this thread is to pitch the selected Bond title of the week to a bunch of studio execs. (fellow members)
Knowing all you know now about the series and the film and not taking into account changes in script or shooting.

A winner will be picked each week and they then have carte blanche to select the next film and pick the winner of that round.

Be as humorous or dramatic as you like and go ahead..how would you have done it?

This weeks Film; OCTOPUSSY

Pitch: Like the pink panther but with eggs, elephants and elegant floating palaces. Guaranteed results.

Comments

  • BondWillReturnBondWillReturn
    edited August 2012 Posts: 816
    Pitch: "A dramatic comedy: Bond, clowns, bombs. What else do you need?"
  • licensetoforumlicensetoforum
    Posts: 371
    Pitch: "Moonraker made money so you'd be a fool to say no to this!"
  • thelivingroyalethelivingroyale
    edited August 2012 Posts: 12,837
    "James Bond. India. Bomb. Tarzan. Clown suit. Pussy in the title. I'll take my cheque now"
  • CraigMooreOHMSSCraigMooreOHMSS Dublin, Ireland
    Posts: 8,217
    Pitch: "Balls, a clown suit, a girl with a little Octopussy, and most importantly, some hard currency."
  • FromCanadaWithLoveFromCanadaWithLove Canada
    Posts: 612
    "It's another Bond movie, the world will pay"
  • M_BaljeM_Balje Amsterdam, Netherlands
    edited August 2012 Posts: 4,520
    It has M, it have Bond, it's not a Pussy and all of this release in Octo ''ber'' pussy.
  • MurdockMurdock The minus world
    Posts: 16,351
    "It's the Biggest...It's the Best...it's OCTOPUSSY!"
  • FromCanadaWithLoveFromCanadaWithLove Canada
    Posts: 612
    Murdock wrote:
    "It's the Biggest...It's the Best...it's OCTOPUSSY!"

    But then you'd be lying.
  • KerimKerim Istanbul Not Constantinople
    Posts: 2,629
    Octopussy...Bond literaly clowns around.
  • Monsieur_AubergineMonsieur_Aubergine Top of the Eiffel Tower with a fly in my soup!
    Posts: 642
    thelivingroyale wrote:
    "James Bond. India. Bomb. Tarzan. Clown suit. Pussy in the title. I'll take my cheque now"

    You got a deal! Cheeky and direct, nice. Although @M_Balje was a very close second. Good stuff agents ( as in hollywood not secret).
    Over to you now @thelivingroyale pick your Bond movie and lets see what our salesmen are made of. ;-)
  • thelivingroyalethelivingroyale
    Posts: 12,837
    Die Another Day

    My pitch: "We make a great, classic first half, we get a talented cast, and that should make the audience happy enough, so we can just piss about after that and throw in any old sh*t. I'm thinking towards the end we use the laser satellite idea again and turn the menacing Korean villian from the PTS into a posh white guy in a videogame suit"
  • TheWizardOfIceTheWizardOfIce 'One of the Internet's more toxic individuals'
    edited August 2012 Posts: 9,117
    'I bet Bond is a big enough draw that we can serve up any old shit and still clear $300m plus. Dont believe me? Then have a read of this script.'
  • RC7RC7
    Posts: 10,512
    He's experienced 'Galore', it's time to get specific.
  • AgentJamesBond007AgentJamesBond007 Vesper’s grave
    edited August 2012 Posts: 2,632
    "It's James Bond vs a White Korean terminator who's trying to destroy Iceland while parasurfing"
  • Baltimore_007Baltimore_007
    Posts: 5,634
    Octopussy - "We couldn't get Keaton, we couldn't get Lloyd, Laurel and Hardy were unavailable so we found Roger Moore and let him run riot"
  • KerimKerim Istanbul Not Constantinople
    edited August 2012 Posts: 2,629
    Die Another Day:

    We honor the past 40 years. See if you can find the shoddy CGI Easter eggs.
  • M_BaljeM_Balje Amsterdam, Netherlands
    edited August 2012 Posts: 4,520
    13669870_ff3b_1024x2000.jpg
    Monalisa set her mask off. Die Another Day 9 Januari in de bioscoop *


    (* English: 9 January in the cinema)
  • Monsieur_AubergineMonsieur_Aubergine Top of the Eiffel Tower with a fly in my soup!
    Posts: 642
    Pitch; Kevin Spacey in Beyond the Ice! ( phone rings) hello?...right,,ok..why?..ok..( holsters phone) ,Spaceys not involved but we still got Brosnan!!!???..oh and its Die Another Day with some surfing and Basil Fawlty...i'll leave it with you cheers bye...( leaves room feeling like a tw@)
  • emilbertilloemilbertillo
    Posts: 153
    Pitch: "For over 40 years, James Bond has faced dangerous people and situations, but not even the greatest spy can imagine a plan so diabolical it almost finished him: a film with no story and a script filled with nothing but cheap innuendos under the guise of the 40th year anniversary of the franchise, engineered by two evil "geniuses" known only as Neal Purvis and Robert Wade. Can he escape from this situation? Find out... IF YOU DARE!
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    Posts: 12,480
    Pitch:
    Die Another Day: Because you can't kill James Bond today. Or any day. So who needs a script? Throw him in a Korean prison and watch him surf his way to saving the world. 40 years of Bond - winks and nods and toss in Halle (who is this year's ripe tomato) and rake in the bucks. Can I get a writing credit, too, now? Thanks!
  • DB5DB5
    Posts: 408
    emilbertillo wrote:
    Pitch: "For over 40 years, James Bond has faced dangerous people and situations, but not even the greatest spy can imagine a plan so diabolical it almost finished him: a film with no story and a script filled with nothing but cheap innuendos under the guise of the 40th year anniversary of the franchise, engineered by two evil "geniuses" known only as Neal Purvis and Robert Wade. Can he escape from this situation? Find out... IF YOU DARE!

    No, he can't escape from this situation! The movie is so bad that we have to reboot a 44 year old franchise and pretend that the first twenty films simply never existed!
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