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I've never actually viewed this film as a Eurospy, but it features elements and locations that would qualify it as one. And seeing as @Seve has already reviewed it, I'll only add my own notes on the film.
@Seve makes some good points which might not make this a film for everyone. It's a slow burner for sure, and more geared towards those that appreciate The Ipcress File and similar films. But unlike Harry Palmer, our hero of the story, Phillip Scott (Stephen Boyd) freelances rather than being forced into the profession, and thus can quit the spy game at any time. He's clearly not enamoured of moonlighting as a secret agent though, at least as the story progresses. In other words, where many Eurospy stories features a Bond type, larger than life main character, this film doesn't.
We do however get the travelogue aspect of Bond films and similar films in the same vein, and it's only in the latter half – in the London scenes towards the climax, when the more exciting spy craft sequences are over, I feel the film could have been more exciting. I do enjoy watching Assignment K though. It's one of those 60's spy films that managed to tap into the more weary, John le Carré like spy world, in contrast to the more action filled, adventure like world of James Bond.
Operation Goldman (but as far as I could tell there is no “Goldman”) aka Lightning Bolt (as “Thunderball” came out the previous year) or my personal favourite, as suggested by a reviewer on IMDB…
“Beerfinger”
This one takes the rocket downing plot from “Dr No” and combines it with a grand scheme to mount a laser weapon on the moon (anticipating “Goldeneye” and “Die Another Day”) in order to rule the World. The villain’s appearance is clearly based on Auric Goldfinger and his undersea base is reminiscent of “The Spy Who Loved Me”.
Production wise, this is a real mixed bag of “the good, the bad and the ugly” of Eurospy, but I’d like to start off with “the good”, which, by the standards of the genre, I might even dare to describe as “great”, namely the villain’s lair and the climax, which is where most Eurospy movies are usually found wanting. Due to their threadbare budgets, the “Emperor” is eventually revealed as having not enough clothes and the audience are left shaking their heads in disappointment or laughing out loud, rather than being excited and thrilled, as intended. Not so here. For once the final third of the movie easily surpasses what has gone before and delivers a surprisingly effective and relatively exciting spectacle.
The futuristic internal sets of the Villain’s undersea base are without doubt the most impressive I have ever encountered in a Eurospy. I think even Ken Adam would approve of them. I’ve asked myself how they could be of such a high standard, when compared with the rest of the production. The best theory I have come up with is that director Antonio Margheriti was also working on his popular “Planets” series of Sci-Fi adventure films over the course of 1966, so he may have either borrowed some of the space age sets used for them (or some other Spaghetti Sci-Fi production) or alternatively, he got the same set designers to knock something up for this movie as part of a larger contract.
The finale does not disappoint either, containing no shortage of action and destruction, with fiery explosions, torrents of red lava, and numerous fight scenes of varying quality. All in all, it comes closer to matching the grandeur of an actual Bond movie climax than any other Eurospy I’ve seen.
However the external visuals of the base are far less effective, consisting of brief, murky shots of a model, which, at a stretch, may remind the viewer of Stromberg’s undersea city in “The Spy Who Loved Me”, but are nowhere near the standard of a Gerry Anderson TV series equivalent from the same period.
So the story concept is above average, the plot development is rudimentary, but contains all the necessary situations required. Fight scenes vary from very good to embarrassingly inept. The dialogue is banal and the music is unremarkable, but they perform their function appropriately.
Anthony is not really good looking enough to be convincing as an “International Man of Mystery”. He ogles his way around the hotel pool, stepping over sunbathing babes, then makes his way across the dancefloor, deliberately walking between dancing couples and leering at the ladies, all the while delivering a smug monologue to the audience. He gives off a sleazy vibe that registers a negative reading on the Suave-o-meter.
Two women aren’t faking an attraction to him, his superior officer, Diana Lorys, who is strangely besotted with him in a totally unprofessional manner, and an air hostess crew member of a sea-plane that he purchases, so he tells us, as part of establishing his cover as a playboy millionaire. Quite a bit of screen time is invested in this purchase process, which seems to be a redundant irrelevance. They do eventually manage to tie the plane back into the story right at the end, but the appearance of a rescue plane at the end of a Eurospy hardly needs a back story to justify it.
His only gadgets are a watch with a Geiger counter and locator beacon (“even tells time” quips Professor Rooney), a pen which releases some sort of teargas, and a cheque book, which he deploys to try and buy his way out of tight spots, with mixed results. It’s a plot device which doesn’t come off and just seems weird and lame, particularly when he tries to bribe the main villain, who is clearly already very rich or he wouldn’t be able to fund his evil scheme.
Diana Lorys, as Agent 36-24-36, holds a higher rank than Anthony and is talked up at the beginning of the movie as being a highly respected and deadly agent by the bosses, while Anthony is referred to as her “assistant”, however in practise Anthony gets all the glory, while she functions mainly as a damsel in distress and romantic interest. Perhaps it’s intended as a joke? A woman taking credit for the man’s heroics?
Wandisa Guida has much the better role, as the beautiful henchwoman who at first appears to be bad, but turns out to have been coerced into co-operating with the villain, because he has cryo-frozen her father as a hostage. It’s a common Eurospy plot element. She gets to change sides, help Anthony escape, kick some ass and foil the villain’s evil scheme, before dying courageously
There is no Ursula Andress, as some imdb reviewers suggested, but there is an Ursula Parker
Jose Maria Caffarel turns up again, but this time his role is not nearly as quirky and interesting as it was in "Ragan". At one point he tangles with Anthony and gets slapped around for information, before being shot by Wandisa. He appears to be seriously wounded, yet turns up again later, apparently unharmed, to tangle with him again, this time with fatal results.
Folco Lulli plays “Mr Rehte”, a Beer Baron seeking World domination. He is portly and sports a quiff of bright red hair, along with a perpetually amused demeanour and a fruity foreign accent. In other words, if you enjoyed Gert Frobe’s characterisation of “Goldfinger” then you will probably enjoy Lulli’s performance as “Beerfinger”. Anthony engages he and his henchmen in an extended battle during the climax, before the two of them eventually end up at the the top of the rocket gantry for a final confrontation (“Beerfinger” takes the lift, leaving Anthony to climb up the hard way)
Florida is the only exotic location, with Cape Kennedy / Canaveral visited via the magic of stock footage. The film begins with extensive scenes of space rocket launching, showing the huge slow moving machines, gantries and sliding hanger doors, and the towering rocket trundling into position. Further footage of blast off, mission control, radio telescope and then several examples of rockets going off course, veering this way and that, becoming engulfed in fire and having to be blown up by remote control. All of which would still have been quite fresh and fascinating for movie audiences in 1966.
Anthony drives a stylish red E type Jag, which gets an extensive workout mid movie, before being blown to smithereens in a bizarre attempt by Anthony to prevent another launch. This incorporates more stock footage of another rocket exploding on the launch pad in an inferno, while Anthony staggers around amongst the fiery carnage, a scene which rather overstays its welcome in my opinion.
There's also a rom-com finish before Anthony and Diana fly off into the sunset
Overall I found that the gap in standard between its best and worst aspects is so wide that it makes it hard to rate.
Goldfinger-esque moments
Beerfinger – (revolving his chair to face Anthony) “Welcome Mr Sennitt, I was certain that sooner or later you would do me the honour of paying me a visit” (studies Anthony for a moment) “You look disappointed”
Anthony – “I was expecting something different. Are you always pushing your beer?”
Beerfinger – “I brew many things young man, including an excellent whiskey, would you care for a drop?”
Anthony – “On the rocks… if you can spare some of your ice”
Beerfinger – “I've never killed anyone until now, Mr. Sennitt, but you may be the first.”
Anthony – “I'll decline the honour”
Beerfinger – “You are the only unpleasant incident in my otherwise impeccable plan”
Anthony – “Thankyou”
Beerfinger - (zaping Anthony with his “lah-ser” beam when he tries to attack him from behind) “Heh, heh, heh, heh, I should have warned you that I’m not particularly fond of personal contact”
The One Eyed Soldiers (the mind boggles!)
Dale may be past his prime physically by this time, but he still has his undoubted charisma and impressive quiff of Elvis style hair. He plays a journalist rather than a spy, and the story is a treasure hunt for personal gain, rather than recovery of information of vital national interest, but aside from that the plot elements fit the template of a Eurospy.
There is a beautiful and mysterious woman, Luciana Paluzzi, who got into the spy business via “The Man From UNCLE”, where she featured in the movie length pilot episode (with second billing, way ahead of David McCallum, who only rates 7th!). That was followed by the undoubted pinnacle of her espionage career, appearing as assassin “Fiona Volpe” in the James Bond movie “Thunderball”. From there she went on to feature in an episode of the spin-off series “The Girl From UNCLE”, the Robert Vaughn spy movie “The Venetian Affair”, and then this one, before signing off on her distinguished spy movie career in one of the French James Bond films “OSS-117 Murder For Sale”. Appearances in three of the most renowned 1960s spy franchises is quite a notable achievement. She starts out strongly in this one, but fades away to become merely a damsel in distress by the end.
Guy Deghy plays a poor man’s Sydney Greenstreet, Mirko Boman is suitably grotesque as his bald mutilated sidekick, and dwarf Milo Avramovic does a decent job of making the lead villain menacing, despite his lack on inches. They provide some much needed colour to mitigate the scripts many shortcomings.
Unfortunately the plot itself is almost non-existent and the dialogue is banal. To say there are “plot holes” would be misleading, as it would imply there is some sort of structure for the holes to exist in, whereas this is just loose sequence of scenes linked by some random running and hiding and shooting and capturing and escaping. The best thing I can say for it is that, for the most part, it is played straight (apart from the appalling fat woman scene) and it moves along at a reasonable pace, thus remaining somewhat watchable.
The few vehicles available in Yugoslavia all appear to be from the 1940s, the rundown locations more reminiscent of a cold war thriller than a Eurospy and the soundtrack is unremarkable.
For die hard Dale and Luciana fans only
Roger Brown’s third Eurospy is an incoherent mess. There are plenty of Bond-esque scenes which are ok when considered individually, but add up to less than the sum of their parts when taken as a whole. In other words the plot makes no sense whatsoever.
Someone is selling arms to the Vietcong (in addition to the Chinese of course) and someone had obtained the evidence and hidden it inside a cigarette lighter in some way before being killed off. Now someone else has it and everyone else wants it. The Americans nominate Roger to represent their interests. So far so good, but after that it’s anyone’s guess what is going on.
The only thing you can rely on is that every five or ten minutes Roger will be attacked by several henchmen and will punch his way out, in his customary exaggerated style.
Women come at Roger so thick and fast during the first half of the movie that I couldn’t keep up with them, but as far as I could tell, although he gets some offers and opportunities, he doesn’t manage to bed any of them, (but I could be wrong, maybe the audience is meant to read more between the lines). However in the end he does manage to arrange an off screen assignation in San Tropez with Russian Agent Helga Line.
While the henchmen are numerous and undistinguished, Miguel de la Riva makes an angry impression in his red polo-neck and Franko Ressel foreshadows Charles Gray in “Diamonds Are Forever” as the evil mastermind.
After a while I gave up trying to keep track of who was who, who was on whose side or who was double crossing who.
Traditional settings like the casino, the docks, the cabaret and the luxury villa are visited and there are some nice locations choices for the key set piece confrontations, an imposing ruined castle on a cliff (with helicopter arrival and departure), and an empty bullring.
There’s also an interesting double torture scene during the climax back at the villa. Helga is tied to a bed and tortured with gold tinsel blown by a fan (I think it was meant to represent some sort of Van de Graff generator style electrical charge?) while Roger is tied to a chair in an alcove, behind a glass wall, and subjected to poison gas. The villain makes them watch each other being tortured but he ends up being distracted by the writhing of Helga and Roger is able to make his move.
Paris, Tripoli, Madrid and other parts of Spain make for acceptable exotic locations.
The soundtrack is adequate with another Shirley Bassey-esque title song that sounds suitably dramatic unless you actually listen to the appalling lyrics.
There is one nice sports car, possibly a Triumph Spitfire Mk 1.
As for gadgets, he has an exploding watch, she has a lipstick with a laser weapon and the villain has a spear-gun umbrella.
Roger would fare much better in his next outing, “The Spy Who Loved Flowers”
Lines You Wouldn’t Hear From The Other Fellow
Francesca Rosano – “It would be very easy to fall in love with a man like you”
Roger – “That would be my pleasure I can assure you (caresses her chin)…now let’s get back to business, where can I find…" (!!! ???)
Mile Stanic – “Couldn’t we…”
Roger – “Some other time (!!! ???), I hope you managed to check her hotel room, that’s all I asked”
Mile – “I know, she’s staying at the etc”
Roger – “Good, I don’t think you should wait till I come back (!!! ???) (Kissing her gently on the mouth) you’re very sweet and someday I want you to meet my twin brother” (???)
After interrogating Rosalba Neri by tickling her feet with a feather
Roger - “Humph, how about that, a wild goose chase, you don’t know anything about anything”
Rosalba – “Well. after all. I’m only a woman”
Roger – “Humph, and I bet you’d be just great at freestyle wrestling… (gently fondles her hair) wouldn’t you”
Rosalba – Chuckles
Roger – “Listen I have a proposition to make (!!! ???) you still broke?”
Rosalba – “Always daring, always”
This one was new to me – and featuring Luciana Paluzzi too! I see it's available on Youtube, so I will have to check it out when I get the chance.
Richard Harrison returns for his third and final Eurospy, this time sporting a pair of glasses ala Harry Palmer.
To me this is a solid production with a serviceable plot, uninspired dialogue and appropriate music, which might well have reached greater heights in the hands of a better than adequate director.
Richard is an insurance investigator rather than a secret agent, but all the usual Eurospy bases are touched. Another investigator has been killed while looking into a series of suspicious deaths among policy holders, and Richard has been brought in as trouble-shooter. The audience have already witnessed his main adversary, Giacomo Rossi-Stuart (Italian father, Scottish mother, perhaps he should have auditioned for the part of James Bond?), a cool customer reminiscent of the Jackal, who assassinates people from a distance with special poison bullets that leave no trace.
Some of the intended victims have got wise to the scheme and gone on the lam, so the story mainly consists of Giacomo letting Richard do all the leg work of trying to locate them, while he follows along behind and tries to knock them off once they have been located. This quest takes them all over the World, sometimes via the magic of stock footage. Giacomo kicks off proceeding by bumping off victims in Rio and Bangkok, before we meet up with Richard in London. From there it’s back to Rio and later Brasilia, before heading off to Hong Kong, then returning to London, with a final romantic denouement in New York.
All the usual action is present and correct, chasing and catching and escaping, with Richard fighting and shooting and being knocked out at appropriate intervals. There are some car pursuits, but none of the cars are particularly notable, although I recall thinking I hadn’t seen many red Mercedes in my life (they are Hong Kong taxis)
There are three beautiful women. Esmeralda Barros, billed as “the girl in the chevy”, who wants to be bedded, but does he make the time? (it all depends how you interpret his comment “eat and run”?). Yoyo, the nightclub escort, who comes to an unfortunate end at the hands of Giacomo, after Richard fails to apply sufficient charm to bed her, and Helene Chanel, the daughter of one of the intended victims, who joins Richard on his mission. She helps out by shooting a few henchmen and becoming his main romantic interest.
In most ways the film is fairly routine, but it does have a handful of moments worth noting.
Firstly it may contain the first instance of the hero and villain jumping out of an aeroplane with only one parachute between them. James Bond did this in Moonraker in 1979 and it apparently took 88 skydives to get all the footage required. Richard and co probably did it in one. Of course they aren’t nearly as successful in creating the illusion, shaky camera work and close-ups of Richard and the henchman hanging from the ceiling in a studio being no substitute for the “real” thing.
The second is the setting for the climactic battle between the two antagonists, which was the Tiger Balm Garden, in Hong Kong, a park on a hillside filled with statues of heroes, gods and demons, depicting scenes from ancient Chinese folk tales, along with grottos, pagodas, temples etc. It makes a fine exotic location for a shootout, although the length of the battle somewhat out stays it’s welcome and the final moments are rather poorly handled by the director, trying to milk too much drama.
The Tiger Balm Garden had special nostalgia for me, as I was shown photos of an equivalent place in Singapore as a child, and was fascinated by it. I later felt compelled to nostalgically visit those same Haw Par gardens as an adult, but of course, the magical feelings of childhood were long gone. The internet tells me that while the original in Hong Kong was demolished in 2004 to make way for a housing project, the Singapore one is still around, along with another intended one at Yong Ding, in Fujian China, that was never completed but still exists as a museum.
Thirdly during the twist ending there is a surprise… which I won’t mention here, but suffice to say it was more unexpected than the actual twist, which is easily deduced in advance.
Meanwhile Richard’s romantic banter is down to his usual standard…
(With Esmeralda)
Esmeralda – “I can wait… if you want”
Richard – “I want”
(Later back at her place)
Richard – “I know it’s rude to eat and run… (leans in to give her a kiss but doesn’t) “Too bad I have to go…”
Esmeralda – (In a hammock looking wistful) “Oh”
(After rescuing Helene from the villains)
Richard – “You won’t object if we sleep in the same room huh?”
Helene – (sounding tired and resigned) “No” (Fondles the poison lipstick provided by the villains, to be used to kill Richard)
Richard – “What’s the matter, you worried… about your makeup?”
Helene – (smiles weakly)
Richard – (Takes her in his arms) “I think that lipstick… will have to wait until tomorrow night”
Richard – (Kisses her, but gets no response) “Well I guess everything waits until tomorrow night”
Helene – “You don’t agree with the old saying – better late than never?”
Richard – “Sure, when my charms fail, I play…the part of the gentleman. I’ll sleep on the sofa”
Helene – (Reconsidering) “Why don’t you sleep in your own bed… gentleman”
Richard – “Why not indeed” (They clinch, kiss and sink sideways onto the bed)
(In his New York apartment)
Richard – “You got a bad deal Mary, I’ll make a lousy husband, I’ve got a wandering eye, I’m untrustworthy, unfaithful…” (They kiss)
Helene – (producing a piano wire garrotte, as used several times by Giacomo during the film, and wrapping it around Richard’s neck) “The killer showed me… how to hang on” (They kiss again)
Giacomo Rossi-Stuart
Another competent Eurospy featuring George Ardisson, let down by plot holes which become bigger and more frequent as we go along and by the customary budgetary restrictions, which leads to laughable special effects during what should be climactic moments
A rich man hires George to find his crusading journalist daughter, who has disappeared while investigating drug smuggling activity in Venezuela. Somewhere along the line the plot morphs into a ransom demand for the daughter and an extortion demand to prevent a number of oil rigs that have been rigged to blow up, thus ruining the Venezuelan economy (which Sanchez, Maduro and co have since managed to do, using slower but equally effective methods)
George makes a convincing hero as usual, but his proclivity for walking into traps and taking a beating pushes the envelope here, even by Eurospy standards. The straw that breaks the camel’s back moment for me being the occasion where George is buried in a railway hopper car under a hopper load of sand, which then sets off on its journey, only for Pascal Audret to have a psychic moment as the carriage passes by and tell the Police Inspector that somehow she know George is in there. The carriage is drained via the hopper mechanism until George’s body is revealed. Pascal tells us he survived using some sort of mini oxygen rebreather apparatus gadget, which has not been foreshadowed or highlighted as is traditional, other than that George may have used it previously when he swam out to the villains private villa (an island or just remote coastal is not made clear)
Women get a mixed bag of opportunities in this one. Christa Linder, as the daughter, gets to show off her body in the opening scene but is otherwise completely wasted, almost invisible and gets no dialogue to speak of. Pascal Audret, as the rival / allied female agent, gets the most screen time and dialogue, but she’s mainly a damsel in distress and messes up when left to guard perennial henchman Sal Borghese. Maria Julio Diaz plays the lead drug mule and gets one decent dramatic scene before being poisoned. While Luciana Angiolillo gets to play the lead villain (villainess?) but lacks the charisma to carry it off in my opinion.
On the men’s side Harold Leipnitz, as the affable male rival / agent and Horst Frank as evil Dr Soarez both make a memorable impression, along with the ever reliable Borghese.
Caracus makes for an unremarkable location, other than looking modern, bustling, clean and shiny, bursting with hope for a better future based on fossil fuels, in sharp contrast to the present day conditions. Similar to Beirut, which appears in so many 1960s Eurospy movies and was once considered the “Riviera” of the Middle East back then, long before Donald Trump revived the term for use in Gaza. Sad how things have turned out.
I suspect other locations, such as the villains villa, may well have been in Italy or France rather than Venezuela.
Well worth a watch if you enjoy the genre
https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BOTI0YWJmZjMtNGJlZi00MjBlLWExNGEtMTA3MGUyMjRiMzYyXkEyXkFqcGdeQXRyYW5zY29kZS13b3JrZmxvdw@@._V1_.jpg
I see there's a three-part upload of Countdown To Doomsday on Youtube, so I'll give that a watch soon too.
______
Edit: Found time to sit down and watch Ring Around The World last night. With your review in mind while watching it @seve, I pretty much came to the same conclusion as you did: A decent enough Eurospy that might have been more than decent under the guidance of a more skilled director. The ending could have been much better too.
The music by Piero Umiliani works well too. Interestingly, there's a track playing in one of the scenes that looks to have been reworked for 1968's Svezia inferno e paradiso (Sweden: Heaven and Hell). I've never seen that film, but I have heard the soundtrack, which is why I recognised the similarities between the two tracks.
Haha, yes! Some movies were spoiled with great music.
On the tele he was a regular in a show called “Spy Trap” and put in guest appearances in “The Avengers”, “The Persuaders”, “Ghost Squad”, “The Strange Report” and a series called “The Spies”, of which all but one episode was wiped during the BBC’s tape wiping holocaust, but he was possibly most well-known, back in the day, for his role as arch rival Daniel Fogarty in the “Onedin Line”.
License To Kill (1965) aka The 2nd Best Secret Agent In The World
Filmed in the UK as a serious Eurospy, repackaged for American audiences with a more spoofy title and a matching title song by serial Sinatra collaborators Sammy Cahn and Jimmy van Heusen, with a vocal from fellow rat packer Sammy Davis junior.
As I say, the film is played about 95% straight, which does not preclude some respectable attempts at Bond-esque one liners relating to, and during interactions with, women, plus a handful of references to James Bond himself, who is treated as a more senior agent and colleague.
Tom Adams looks the part, but there’s something missing. Perhaps he’s a bit wooden, or perhaps he’s been instructed to under play, but just doesn’t have the skill or charisma to pull that off. Whichever, he is far below Richard Johnson level, not even able to reach Ray Danton level in my opinion. But the rest of the cast is populated with familiar characters from UK productions, who all contribute suitably colourful performances
The only gadget Tom is provided with is an eeny-weeny, teeny-tiny gun, from Y branch, which is rather underwhelming. Fortunately he still has his regular pistol, a “broom handle / box cannon” Mauser C96, which he keeps in a special holster on the small of his back. However he does manage to bed three woman across the course of the movie, so his sexual prowess credentials are not in question.
The film has two major faults
Firstly its overcomplicated plot, which is such that the director felt the need to have an entire long winded scene at the end of the film in order to explain it to Tom (and the viewer), and the amount of screen time devoted to the theory and nature of the Macguffin (“regrav” - reverse gravity), is quite un-necessary.
Secondly, the dull and lifeless direction, which is completely without imagination or flair, on a level acceptable for a television show, but not the big screen.
The same goes for the action scenes, which mainly involve lots and lots of shooting. (OK, to be fair, I should acknowledge he makes a couple of nice moves with his guns, in amongst the dross). There’s only one hand to hand combat scene, which is a mess, and one car chase, which is very run of the mill, but no less than three vehicle-blocking-the-road ambushes. Clearly there was no budget for car crashes or explosions either, as the helicopter scene at the climax is embarrassingly inept.
However enough people liked it to make someone believe that sequels were viable.
Bondian Banter
Rockwell – “I’ll give you one man”
Pickering – “Alright, one man, but he must be your best… how about that boy who settled that gold conspiracy, what’s his name? Bondson…?”
Rockwell – “I’m afraid he’s otherwise engaged, but I’ve got a good man for you…”
(Tom is in bed with a beautiful girl, phone rings…)
Tom – “Hello”
Rockwell – “Is that Charles Vine”
Tom – “Yes, of course it is”
Rockwell – “Its Rockwell here”
Tom – “Oh, good morning sir”
Rockwell – “Are you tied up at the moment?”
Tom – “No, I’ve nothing on at present…”
Rockwell – “Ah, could you possibly drag yourself away from her?”
(At the airport)
Prof Jacobsen – “This is my assistant, Miss Lindberg”
Tom – “Miss Lindberg, it will be a pleasure having you”
Miss Lindberg – “Having me where Mr Vine?” (smirk)
Tom – (smirks and turns back to the professor) “Your car is waiting…”
(Later, in the car, where Tom and the cameraman have been leering at Miss Lindberg’s legs)
Prof Jacobsen – “You are a scientist Mr Vine?”
Tom – “Yes, in a way”
Miss Lindberg – “In which field?”
Tom – “I studied mathematics, why?”
Miss Lindberg – “I’m sorry, I assumed it was physiology, you seem to have an obsessive interest in anatomy”
Tom – “I am interested in certain areas of the subject” (smirk)
Miss Lindberg (smirk)
(At the research facility)
Tom – “You enjoying yourself?”
Computer Girl – “I am. I have an aptitude for figures.”
Tom – “So have I. Tell me, what does this machine do?”
Computer Girl – “It gives general information, depending on the questions it receives.”
Tom - “I see. Ask it for your telephone number, will you?”
(Later, in bed)
Computer Girl –“Why, what’s your name?”
Tom – “Charles Vine”
Computer Girl –“It’s funny, I met someone like you in Florida”
Tom – “Oh really, who was he?”
Computer Girl –“James, James something”
Tom – “Oh, ah, what did he do?”
Computer Girl –“He told me he was a vacuum cleaner salesman”
Tom – “Ah, isn’t that a coincidence, so am I” (clinch)
Desperate Mission
This is a polished Eurospy, with some decent dialogue and competent action.
Professor MacGuffin has been kidnapped and then rescued, but when the agent (Z-54) involved in the rescue operation is killed, the whereabouts of the prof becomes a mystery for both the good guys and the bad guys. The villains are a private organisation that undertakes criminal activity and the Chinese government, who have hired them to do the kidnapping. The good guys are an American agency who assign agent Z-55 (German) to sort it out.
However the middle section of the story is rather complicated and pointless, with much time wasted while German tries to convince the villains that he himself is a criminal who they could hire to do what he was planning to do anyway. They are onto him from the start and yet decide to play along as they don’t know where the professor is either. All German appears to achieve by this ruse is to lead the villains to the professor, so that he effectively has find and rescue him all over again.
The only exotic location is Hong Kong, but it is well used, with lots of great location footage, such as planes landing at the old airport, famous for its runway amongst the apartment buildings, and plenty of action in and around the harbour. Mostly the director does a reasonable job of disguising any budgetary constraints.
It has a decent spy-style soundtrack, with music matched to the appropriate mood of the onscreen activity.
There’s a nice opening action sequence, and later a very good extended car / boat chase. Also plenty of well-planned fisticuffs. The only problem for me was that much of the action occurred at night, which made it hard to actually see and follow what was going on, however that may also have been partly due to the quality of the print I was watching, which was of very substandard quality.
German makes a very suitable secret agent, he has the looks and sufficient acting ability to project confidence and competence, even if his scripted actions sometimes bely that.
Womanising wise, he makes a strong start, putting the moves on Susan Baker, but just as he gets her on the bed, he is interrupted by the inevitable call from his boss and foolishly says he’ll be back in five minutes. However he does manage to bed Maria Luisa Rispoli, plus he earns some “Connery cruelty” points for slapping her around later, in order to obtain information. Then he eventually ends up in the arms of “bad-girl-turned-good” Yoko Tani. As Meat Loaf said, “Two Out Of Three Ain’t Bad”.
The private villains are well led by Gianni Rizzo, the type of sly looking overweight actor who often play big bad bosses in Eurospys and Spaghetti Westerns. Giovanni Cianfriglia also makes an impression as the main strong-arm / assassin henchman.
On the female side, Leontine Snell plays Gianni’s partner / assistant, but gets little to do. Maria Luisa Rispoli has the better role, as the femme fatale, but I found her performance a bit sullen or wooden and it’s no wonder she fails to put German off his guard.
The ethnic makeup of the Chinese contingent is rather embarrassing by modern standards, led by English / Indian actor Milton Read, who doesn’t look remotely Chinese and Japanese actress Yoko Tani, who is, at least, Asian. The rest of their henchmen are Hong Kong locals and therefore quite authentic.
However, from a purely cinematic viewpoint, Milton Read is hard to beat, he was born to play bad guys, with his shaved head, pock marked face and powerful wrestler’s physique (which is exactly what he did when not acting). Such was his screen presence that he usually played a henchman with few, if any, lines of dialogue, as his appearance was self-explanatory, but here he gets to play one of the main protagonists, so this could well be the high point of his movie career. As always, Yoko Tani is suitably coy as the eventual love interest.
Well worth a watch
Bondian banter
(German picks the lock of a hotel room, enters, removes his jacket and tie, undoes his top shirt button, shoots his cuffs and adopts a relaxed position, reclining on the bed…still wearing his shoes though)
Susan – (emerging from the steamy bathroom tying her bath robe) “Oh… you” (as in ‘you scallywag’)
German – “What I’ve seen convinces me that it’s a good idea to show up for a date a little early” (smirk)
Susan – “But it isn’t fair, I’m not even ready”
German – “Hmm… That’s were your wrong” (clinch)
Susan – “You’re always in such a hurry”
German – “Someone has to break the ice at the party” (clinch)
Susan – “By the way, how did you manage to get in?”
German – “Hmmm… I managed… There are no barriers to true love” (clinch)
(Phone rings…)
(In Maria’s hotel room)
Maria – “Want a drink?”
German – “Yeah, my throats dry”
(Maria pours him a drink and he takes a swallow)
German – “What’s under that negligee…? No don’t bother telling me, let me guess”
Maria – “… I’m only trying to help you, tomorrow if you like, I’ll introduce you to a very influential man”
German – “If that’s the case, then I’ll have to be nice to you” (manoeuvring her over to the bed)
Maria – (looks down at the bed) “This is the end of the line”
German – “Then I guess we’d better… get off” (they descend together onto the bed)
Do you know if License To Kill (1965) aka The 2nd Best Secret Agent In The World have ever got a proper DVD release? I'm yet to watch this one, and the only prints I've seen online, looks to be the same as this one on Youtube.
Polished and Eurospy isn't two words you always see together in the same sentence, so I'll have to give Desperate Mission a watch too! This one has gone completely under the radar for me, as well has the sequel. The upload I found of this one on Youtube isn't very good, but at least I'll get the chance to watch it. Is Youtube your main source of finding these, @Seve – or is there other sites you can find them?
I haven't got around to watching many Eurospy films lately, but I did watch Secret Agent Fireball a month or so ago. It's been a long time since I last watched it, but it held up just as well on this viewing. Richard Harrison might not have been the very best of the Eurospy leading men, but he's decent in this one. I'll have to give Killers Are Challenged a watch again too soon.
I searched the Net for lists and reviews of what the best Eurospy movies were, then looked for them on Youtube. While searching for one thing on Youtube, quite often something else of interest pops up that I didn't know about, as a side menu suggestion.
It occurs to me now that Internet Archive can also be a good place to search for a copy, as it has alot of stuff where the copyright has been allowed to expire.
Case in point, I just found a copy of "Where The Bullets Fly" and "Somebody's Stolen Our Russian Spy" on IA and downloaded it, so thanks for prompting me @Torgeirtrap
Robert Wagner does a Eurospy
Wikipedia says that “Wagner's friend and agent Albert Broccoli suggested that he audition to play James Bond, but he decided it was not right for him.” (Yeah right!)
And
“The following year, he produced and cast himself opposite Bette Davis in the made-for-TV film Madame Sin, which was theatrically released overseas as a feature film.”
Robert played a jewel thief who becomes a reluctant secret agent in “It Takes A Thief” on the television, as well as another jewel thief alongside David Niven in “The Pink Panther” on the big screen, and would later play a high class con-man in “The Switch” (and much, much later, he would play #2 in the Austin Powers spoof series), so it’s the type of smooth operator role that suits him well.
Bette Davis plays a female “Dr No” (half Chinese and no more convincing than Joseph Wiseman in that regard) who runs a SPECTRE like organisation with designs on a British Nuclear submarine. She plans to use brainwashing to gain the co-operation of the subs captain, Gordon Jackson, and kid-knaps Catherine Schell in order to coerce Robert into assisting her. She also has a fancy sonic rifle in her arsenal, which can disable and kill.
She has oily Denholm Elliott as her second in command and Dudley Sutton brings his distinctive skull like visage to the role of henchman. Pik Sen Lim and Bert Kwouk are also along to add a more authentic Asian flavour.
It’s a polished TV level production, but never feels like anything more than that, plus I’ve never been a fan of 1960s “Manchurian candidate” subgenre of espionage movies. The downbeat ending doesn’t sit quite right with me either (the price of having Bette on board?)
However I’ve always had a big crush on Catherine Schell, so it worth waiting around till the end just to see her in a bikini.
Catherine was one of Blofeld’s “Angels of Death” in “On Her Majesties Secret Service” with George Lazenby (as Catherina von Schell). Previously she had a small role in “Assignment K”, then continued her espionage career in “The Black Windmill” with Michael Caine and “Callan” with Edward Woodward.
On television she was almost ubiquitous, appearing in “The Persuaders” with Roger Moore, “The Return Of The Saint” with Ian Ogilvy and almost any other UK drama series in the 1970s and 80s you can think of.
Thanks, @Seve! Looks like I have to check out the Internet Archive too!
I downloaded a digital copy of Madame Sin some years ago, but never got around to watch it. Robert Wagner has always made a good impression in the things I've seen him in, so I will have to dig this one out again. A decent cast too, by the looks of it!
Tom Adams returns for a second go-round as Charles Vine, but without his broom handle Mauser.
This second edition is intended to be more of a spoof from the get go, I can tell this because half the actors are familiar faces from UK comedy, all hamming it up to the hilt, rather than because there is any great amount of humour inherent in the script itself. It’s mainly comedy in the broad style of a “Carry-On” movie, which relies heavily on the energetic mugging of the actors themselves in order to generate laughs (there is even a cameo from “Carry-On” stalwart Sid James). Meanwhile the other half of the cast are still playing it straight, while another overcomplicated plot contains long sequences that are devoid of comedic possibilities.
For me it makes for an odd mixture, the comedy and drama are each diluted by the other and, as a result, neither aspect is able to build any momentum. Emblematic of this issue is the character “Seraph”, played by Tim Barrett, who is, on one hand, supposed to be a deadly assassin, while, on the other hand, playing the fool for cheap laughs, undermining any serious credibility as a threat, or adversary, for Tom. As it happens he ends up being despatched by the Russians, for no logical reason, other than to facilitate a couple of action scenes in the unconvincing plot.
Another disappointment on the acting side is Michael Ripper as “Angel”. He plays the lead villain, which is a big step up for him from his usual supporting roles in Hammer productions. At first I thought he might be an interesting Himmler style villain, with his crew-cut and glasses, until it dawned on me that he was actually intended to be Asian, complete with false front buck teeth, in the worst UK / USA tradition of a Japanese WW2 caricature.
There are plenty of action scenes, but they are all poorly choreographed and executed, by comparison with many of the Italian / Spanish productions I have been watching. Outside of the Bond franchise itself, filming hand to hand combat sequences seems to be a common weakness in UK spy movies of this era (however they do a much better job in television).
Tom’s performance remains nicely understated (or slightly wooden, depending on what mood the viewer is in) but the sexual innuendo one liners he is given to deliver are again a highlight for me, most being worthy of an actual Bond movie IMHO.
By my count he again manages to bed three women in this one, which keeps him up there in the big league, alongside Connery, Moore and Hubschmid. There’s Sue Donovan, as Celia, at her place, Suzan Farmer, as Caron, on the train and finally Dawn Addams, as Fiz, twice, at the airbase and again on the plane itself, after she is lowered in from a helicopter, in order to save Charles (and the top secret aircraft) from crashing (auto-pilot is a wonderful invention).
Bondian Banter
(During the “Q” Scene, Tom is on the firing range and shoots a busty female silhouette target twice in the brazier)
Officer – “Passing fair I suppose”
Tom – “How kind”
Officer – “Incidentally Vine, how to you keep your trousers up?”
Tom – “Self-control”
(After being picked up by Sue)
Sue – “Home Charles?”
Tom – “No, St James’, I’m afraid”
Sue – “There are crumpets still for tea”
Tom – “Much as I adore crumpets…”
(During the “M” scene)
Rockwell – “By the way Vine have you checked through your security regulations recently?
Tom – “Every day Sir”
Rockwell – “Then how is it that ‘A’ section reports you were picked up by a woman right outside the armoury this morning?”
Tom – “That Sir, was an unfortunate co-incidence, she just happened to be passing by at the time”
Rockwell – “A lot of women seem to spend most of their time just passing by you don’t they”
Tom – “I wouldn’t go so far as to say that sir, a few of them have been known to stop”
(Tom and Sue are in bed)
Tom – “Can you smell something burning?”
Sue – (Giving Tom a meaningful look) “Yes” (clinch)
(Later Sue gets up and goes to into the kitchen to check, wearing only Tom's shirt)
Tom – “Can I have my shirt back”
Sue – “Are you going to wear it?”
Tom – “Eventually…” (smirk)
Richard Johnson returns as Bulldog Drummond and gives another impressively “Bond-esque” performance. Apparently true blue BD fans don’t like this very 1960s incarnation of the character, personally I don’t have much BD experience myself, I’ve only seen the Ronald Coleman and Ray Milland versions, where the character appears to be in a similar vein to the Saint, i.e. a man who just naturally seems to attract adventure and intrigue like a magnet, while also very much reflecting the personality traits of the two actors playing the part. According to Wikipedia, “Ian Fleming stated that James Bond was "Sapper (i.e. BD) from the waist up and Mickey Spillane below". Close enough for me then.
It’s another polished production, perhaps the budget might even be higher this time around, but, if so, they didn’t invest any of it in the script, which largely recycles the plot of “Deadlier Than The Male”.
As per DTTM, a duo of femme fatales are wreaking havoc, murdering business men (or engineers or professors etc.), blowing up factories and bring down jet planes, in colourful ways which are intended to be amusing and / or exciting. As usual one is aggressive and dominating (Dahlia Lavi instead of Elke Sommer) while the other is eccentric and quirky (Bebar Loncar instead of Sylva Koscinar).
They are also assisted by a bevy of additional, but more expendable, beauties, including the now beloved Joanna Lumley, who makes a brief appearance before sadly being blown up in a suicide mission (the girls are subject to mind control, as is so often the case in Spy Spoofs).
Nemesis villain Carl Peterson is behind it all again, but unfortunately it seems Nigel Green was not available, so we have make do with James Villiers, who is nowhere near as convincingly menacing as Nigel was. He adopts various disguises at times, but his unusual height makes them unconvincing and a bit silly.
Like DTTM the scene of the action eventually shifts from England to some suitably attractive Mediterranean coastal locations, this time the villain’s lair is located in an impressive modernist hotel on a clifftop (instead of an impressive ancient castle on a clifftop), which is portrayed as being a private island, and is also equipped with a submarine pen style cave, complete with sliding vertical entrance door.
Richard’s comic sidekick for the first half of the film is a cute female played by Sydne Rome, rather than a nephew, and later, when Sydne’s roll changes from comic relief to something more significant, Ronnie Steven’s takes her place in performing that function.
Richard drove a Bentley in DTTM (as Book-Bond did) this time around he gets to drive an Aston Martin (like Connery-Bond). He also gets to para glide behind a fizz boat (but using a hand glider rather than a parachute, as would be customary today), fly a glider (via the magic of back projection), make an emergency parachute jump and race a high powered speed boat, so this edition is definitely a step up from DTTM in regard to “flash” action. The special effects are well dodgy by today’s standards, but superior to most Eurospys and on a par with much of what we see in the older Bond movies.
In a change of pace Richard gets to bed evil Dahlia Lavi twice (one area where her counterpart Elke Sommer failed miserably in DTTM) and ends up with hench-girl Vanessa Howard, so he maintains his average of 2 per movie.
The sound track is very good, possibly even better than DTTM.
Putting aside my usual gripe of not liking Spy Spoofs, as much as I can, the only thing I really hated about the film was Robert Morley and his silly cooking school scenes. The first time I watched the film I almost gave up on it right then and there. Even so it spoiled my enjoyment of the rest of the movie, and coloured my opinion of it afterwards. However forewarned is forearmed, so this time I managed to get over it and enjoy the rest of the film for what it is. Fortunately Morley’s character is killed off quickly.
I also found the assassination of the old professor got too silly for my taste and I could also do without the Duke of Wellington costume that James Villiers wears in one scene.
Overall though, along with the James Coburn “Flint” films and “Fathom” with Rachel Welch, I rate these Richard Johnson films as the most enjoyable 1960s Spy Spoofs I have seen, while still being light years short of being as funny as a good episode of "Get Smart".
I'm familiar with Some Girls Do, and even though I only see it as the weaker sequel to Deadlier Than The Male, it's still enjoyable – and the production quality is obviously better than most Eurospys. It would have been great if they had made a third Bulldog Drummond entry with Richard Johnson, but by 1969 the Bondmania had likely already had its moment, so it might have been unlikely to ever happen.
I've been looking into French Eurospys this Easter, having watched two of the Francis Coplan films made during the 50's/60's. The first one, Action immédiate (To Catch a Spy, 1957) predates the Bond films, and plays out more like a traditional crime film.
The plot surrounds blueprints of an aeroplane built from an ultra-secret metal, which are stolen from national security. French secret service believes that the documents are now in Switzerland, in the hands of a man named Lindbaum. Lindbaum agrees to hand over the bluprints and a plate of this secret metal in return for a large sum (obviously), but as it turns out, he doesn't have the entire plate and documents, as Lindbaum has been double-crossed by Kalpannen, who got hold of it all in the first place. From here Francis Coplan (played by Henri Vidal) sets out to find Kalpannen, and retrieve the stolen goods.
To Catch a Spy is well worth a watch if you want to watch a pre-Bond Eurospy. It kind of reminded me of the early German Edgar Wallace film productions of the late 50's, but instead of a detective as the main character, you have a spy.
I then watched Coplan sauve se peau (Coplan Saves His Skin, 1968), which is the final film of the series. This one is much more in the Bond vein, complete with a disfigured main villain wearing a nehru jacket and a pet cat! In this film, Francis Coplan (played by Claudio Brook, known to Bond fans as Montelongo, the manager of the Banco de Isthmus in LTK) is contacted by an old girlfriend in Turkey who is in desperate need of help, and tells him details about a dangerous plot. But the former girlfriend is killed, and a trail leads to a mad a mad scientist driven insane by radioactive fallout from a failed experiment.
Set and shot in Turkey, Coplan Saves His Skin offers much more of what we expect and Eurospy to be, and features actors like Klaus Kinski and Margaret Lee, making this a enjoyable watch.
Indeed, @Gerard!