The Bond Movies & Actors I Can't Stand (Negativity Only Please)

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  • Benny wrote: »
    Rolling around like a pastry. Is this common practice for pastries? I'd change my baker if they roll around.
    Sausage rolls maybe?
  • TheWizardOfIceTheWizardOfIce 'One of the Internet's more toxic individuals'
    Posts: 9,117
    Top 3 replacement Moore/OP train rooftop pastry jokes:

    1) He rolled around like they were going to wrap him in seaweed!
    2) He rolled around like he was on fire and Moneypenny had a bucket of water!
    3) He rolled around like he was waiting for Barbara Bach to head-butt him with her ginormous forehead!

    The word 'joke' has issued a statement on its website disassociating itself from doubleohdad and his alleged 'hilarious' wit.

    Have I missed a memo or something and comedy has regressed 40 years? Although to be fair even the likes of Are You Being Served would reject you as a scriptwriter.
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    Posts: 12,480
    Well, I like keeping this thread open actually. It can be an ongoing open channel to just vent and be negative. Without spam, it works great. I see no need to close it any time soon at all, @chrisisall.
  • DrShatterhandDrShatterhand Garden of Death, near Belfast
    Posts: 805
    I don't see why the thread should be closed just because someone's derailed the thread by repeating the same crap joke over and over. I'd suggest this approach

    1. Say what it is you dislike (and try to be specific e.g.a character or scenes, a general comment like 'I think Dalton is a bit poo' isn't that interesting)
    2. Warm yourself with the glow from fellow sufferers
    3. Move on
  • mcdonbbmcdonbb deep in the Heart of Texas
    Posts: 4,116
    I really don't get the pastry joke :-/ ...well maybe I got the allegory just not the humor.

    I take pastries seriously.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    Trying to blame Roger, for the obesity out break in Britain ! :))
  • AceHoleAceHole Belgium, via Britain
    edited January 2015 Posts: 1,731
    The early 70's were the absolute nadir for Bond movies. Cubby and Saltzman had lost the plot completely. DAF and 'GG are the main culprits.

    Painfully tacky & boring PTS' (DAF & TMWGG especially - HOW can you not even manage to get a PTS right? I mean even DAD managed this??!)

    Lacklustre performances from everybody, across the whole line, save for Christopher Lee

    Low production values all round. Tacky, cheap and boring. Where are the great set pieces?? The underwater derring-do? The cool vehicles? The mid air heroics?

    Boring stunts. I mean really insomniac inducing stuff. Only LALD had one or two decent stunts.


    Only LALD comes out of this half-decade with a smidgeon of respectability...
  • Posts: 7,507
    AceHole wrote: »
    The early 70's were the absolute nadir for Bond movies. Cubby and Saltzman had lost the plot completely. DAF and 'GG are the main culprits.

    Painfully tacky & boring PTS' (DAF & TMWGG especially - HOW can you not even manage to get a PTS right? I mean even DAD managed this??!)

    Lacklustre performances from everybody, across the whole line, save for Christopher Lee

    Boring stunts. I mean really insomniac inducing stuff. Only LALD had one or two decent stunts.


    Only LALD comes out of this half-decade with a smidgeon of respectability...

    Spot on!
  • AceHoleAceHole Belgium, via Britain
    edited January 2015 Posts: 1,731
    jobo wrote: »
    AceHole wrote: »
    The early 70's were the absolute nadir for Bond movies. Cubby and Saltzman had lost the plot completely. DAF and 'GG are the main culprits.

    Painfully tacky & boring PTS' (DAF & TMWGG especially - HOW can you not even manage to get a PTS right? I mean even DAD managed this??!)

    Lacklustre performances from everybody, across the whole line, save for Christopher Lee

    Boring stunts. I mean really insomniac inducing stuff. Only LALD had one or two decent stunts.


    Only LALD comes out of this half-decade with a smidgeon of respectability...

    Spot on!

    It's no coincidence that TSWLM had all that iconic imagery - the ski/parachute jump, white gadget Lotus blowing up Naomie's 'chopper while submerged (one of the most iconic action scenes, for me), all the submarines, enormous battle inside the tanker, Stombergs ocean-lair extravaganza including shark pool et al.
    I mean come one - that is more cool stuff in ONE movie than we'd had in three paltry efforts preceding it!!

    Cubby had a lot to answer for, and it was put all the money on the screen or go bust in 1976/77
  • Posts: 1,146
    AceHole wrote: »
    The early 70's were the absolute nadir for Bond movies. Cubby and Saltzman had lost the plot completely. DAF and 'GG are the main culprits.

    Painfully tacky & boring PTS' (DAF & TMWGG especially - HOW can you not even manage to get a PTS right? I mean even DAD managed this??!)

    Lacklustre performances from everybody, across the whole line, save for Christopher Lee

    Low production values all round. Tacky, cheap and boring. Where are the great set pieces?? The underwater derring-do? The cool vehicles? The mid air heroics?

    Boring stunts. I mean really insomniac inducing stuff. Only LALD had one or two decent stunts.


    Only LALD comes out of this half-decade with a smidgeon of respectability...

    And when they did do cool stunts, they were completely undercut by comedy right after. It was like they were doing a TV show instead of a movie.
  • ThomasCrown76ThomasCrown76 Augusta, ks
    Posts: 757
    United artists cut the budgets during that time and it really showed on the screen.
  • mcdonbbmcdonbb deep in the Heart of Texas
    Posts: 4,116
    Apparently y'all didn't see the 80's :/
  • ThomasCrown76ThomasCrown76 Augusta, ks
    Posts: 757
    They peaked in moonraker and went downhill after that
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    It is a negativity thread, so all views and opinions are correct. :)
    Although I thought it wasn't so much a problem of cutting budgets
    But rather that the budget wasn't increased ( which I admitted is a
    Similar thing ) .
    So in a way well done John Glen, in my opinions they still looked good
    Except for LTK, which did suffer, in my opinion.
    ( although I'll point out LTK, is one of my favourite bonds).
  • DaltonCraig007DaltonCraig007 They say, "Evil prevails when good men fail to act." What they ought to say is, "Evil prevails."
    Posts: 15,719
    I think we all know who dealt with @doubleohdad...

    WG-2.jpg


    Thanks to the mod team too :)

    Now back to regular service; DAD's second is just awful. It starts to get wrong when Jinx enters the film, and i think the movies takes the fatal dive when Jinx dives into and water at the end of the Cuba sequence. And the worse is yet to come: the Virtual Reality scene, which would get worse as Q introduce the invisible car, things get even worse in iceland with the tidal wave and 'Yo mamma', and things get worse yet with the Antonov sequence, because Jinx gets equal screentime than Bond, and things get worse big time with the second Virtual Reality scene, the infamous love scene with Miss Moneypenny.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    I always wondered given the amount of snow in Iceland, why the
    Secret Service didn't help out " The over burdened British tax payer".
    By instead of an invisible car, they just gave Bond back his white
    Lotus from TSWLM, as you'd never see it in the snow ! :D
    Although I do agree the first half of DAD is good, then takes a bit of
    A downhill slide in the second.
  • DaltonCraig007DaltonCraig007 They say, "Evil prevails when good men fail to act." What they ought to say is, "Evil prevails."
    Posts: 15,719
    I wonder what's the point of making invisible a car that can be heard from 10 miles away, which would alert suspicion any time the engine gets roared up? Is Bond meant to drive at 5km/h so the baddies don't hear the engine? :-B
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    =))
  • Posts: 11,425
    jobo wrote: »
    AceHole wrote: »
    The early 70's were the absolute nadir for Bond movies. Cubby and Saltzman had lost the plot completely. DAF and 'GG are the main culprits.

    Painfully tacky & boring PTS' (DAF & TMWGG especially - HOW can you not even manage to get a PTS right? I mean even DAD managed this??!)

    Lacklustre performances from everybody, across the whole line, save for Christopher Lee

    Boring stunts. I mean really insomniac inducing stuff. Only LALD had one or two decent stunts.


    Only LALD comes out of this half-decade with a smidgeon of respectability...

    Spot on!

    i'm concerned that there isnt enough Brosnan bashing going on. Rog and john Glen seem to be taking all the heat

    i agree the early 70s were a tough time for Bond, and it was clearly a dodgy phase in the series. i think in contrast the 80s were more consistent - Glen brought a general level of entertainment that worked very well. he may not be the most inspired director, but his films have a distinct feel all of their own - i actaully really like the Glen era. however, even those early 70s films have things going for them. they contain some classic scenes and characters.

    for me the real low low point for Bond was 95-2002. for me that entire era is just devoid of pretty much any redeeming features.
  • AceHoleAceHole Belgium, via Britain
    edited January 2015 Posts: 1,731
    Getafix wrote: »
    jobo wrote: »
    AceHole wrote: »
    The early 70's were the absolute nadir for Bond movies. Cubby and Saltzman had lost the plot completely. DAF and 'GG are the main culprits.

    Painfully tacky & boring PTS' (DAF & TMWGG especially - HOW can you not even manage to get a PTS right? I mean even DAD managed this??!)

    Lacklustre performances from everybody, across the whole line, save for Christopher Lee

    Boring stunts. I mean really insomniac inducing stuff. Only LALD had one or two decent stunts.


    Only LALD comes out of this half-decade with a smidgeon of respectability...

    Spot on!

    i'm concerned that there isnt enough Brosnan bashing going on. Rog and john Glen seem to be taking all the heat

    i agree the early 70s were a tough time for Bond, and it was clearly a dodgy phase in the series. i think in contrast the 80s were more consistent - Glen brought a general level of entertainment that worked very well. he may not be the most inspired director, but his films have a distinct feel all of their own - i actaully really like the Glen era.


    So do I, but I think it may be a generational thing?
    Moore (only just...) and Dalton were Bond when I had just started to become aware of tv & cinema, so the 80's will always be the 'original' cinema decade for me, and OP through LTK are a big part of that.
  • Posts: 11,425
    may be its generational yeah. there is something very comforting about those 80s movies
  • edited January 2015 Posts: 1,596
    I like the Glen era as well. He lacked flair and discernible style (definitely a workman director) but he got the job done and coaxed out some of Moore's best performances.
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    Posts: 23,883
    I like the Glen era as well. He lacked flair and discernible style (definitely a workman director) but he got the job done and coaxed out some of Moore's best performances.

    Completely agreed. You knew what to expect in a John Glen film, like it or not. Which is more than can be said for some of the idiots (Tamahori & Apted come to mind) that helmed some of the later movies.
  • mcdonbbmcdonbb deep in the Heart of Texas
    Posts: 4,116
    Tamahori is just weird... I had higher hopes for him. But then I did for Aoted too.

    I respect the folks that like Glen but I don't get it or see it.

  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,804
    mcdonbb wrote: »

    I respect the folks that like Glen but I don't get it or see it.
    Out of FIVE entries? Nothing good there for you?
    :-?
  • I respect that Tamahori had flair, style, and ambition.

    Apted lacked all of that. The difference between Apted and John Glen is that Glen, with years of working on the Bond films, had a solid idea in mind and knew how to deliver (I really love Octopussy - The Living Daylights. It also helped that he had a decent script.
  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    This thread has really slowed down over the last few days. I cant imagine why ;)
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    Posts: 23,883
    As someone said on another thread, je suis doubloh et je suis aston
  • MajorDSmytheMajorDSmythe "I tolerate this century, but I don't enjoy it."Moderator
    Posts: 13,978
    bondjames wrote: »
    As someone said on another thread, je suis doubloh et je suis aston

    "They met their Waterloo." ;)
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,804
    bondjames wrote: »
    As someone said on another thread, je suis doubloh et je suis aston

    "They met their Waterloo." ;)

    =)) C'est bien.
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