Things We've Learned from…..Spectre

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  • edited February 2015 Posts: 1,394
    40) Brosnan came into his own in this film and proved to be the best Bond next to Sean Connery.

    41) Michelle Yeoh is beautiful and kicks ass.

    42) David Arnold was the savior of the Bond franchise as far as soundtracks go after that terrible Eric Serra effort in the last movie.

    43) Elliot Carver is one of the most entertaining Bond villains.

    44) This film has some of the best action of the entire franchise.
  • AstonLotus wrote: »
    40) Brosnan came into his own in this film and proved to be the best Bond next to Sean Connery.

    41) Michelle Yeoh is beautiful and kicks ass.

    42) David Arnold was the savior of the Bond franchise as far as soundtracks go after that terrible Eric Serra effort in the last movie.

    43) Elliot Carver is one of the most entertaining Bond villains.

    44) This film has some of the best action of the entire franchise.

    With the exception of #41 those are all MASSIVE overstatements in my humble opinion.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    I think (42) is correct David Arnold is a fantastic composer and a great choice
    After the wonderful J Barry.
  • ThomasCrown76ThomasCrown76 Augusta, ks
    Posts: 757
    45. James Bond finally admits the futility of arguing with a woman. They're always right.

    46. There are times James Bond would rather just stay undercover.

    47. James Bond still sleeps with a gun under his pillow
  • TokolosheTokoloshe Under your bed
    Posts: 2,667
    DoubleOhh, don't forget about this thread... we were nearly there!
  • edited March 2015 Posts: 5,993
    I will try to revive this thread :

    48. Now we know the answer to the old joke "What's black and white and red all over ?"

    49. Panties, stockings and suspenders, but no bra ? For shame, Mrs. Carver !

    If nobody has anything more to say about the movie, I suggest we go straight to TWINE.
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,249
    50. If Bond says 'I'll be right back' it might actually take some years before you meet again.
  • suavejmfsuavejmf Harrogate, North Yorkshire, England
    Posts: 5,131
    The first hour of is great, but as soon as he undertakes the Halo jump....the film becomes an excuse for action sequences with little or no engaging story. The score is good too.
  • Mendes4LyfeMendes4Lyfe The long road ahead
    Posts: 8,395
    This is a bottom 5 film for me.
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,249
    suavejmf wrote: »
    The first hour of is great, but as soon as he undertakes the Halo jump....the film becomes an excuse for action sequences with little or no engaging story. The score is good too.
    good point.
    51. Bond does HALO-jumps dressed in heavily branded equipment.

  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    52 Screw pedestrians.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    Re: 50
    When Bond said " I'll be right back" he was trying out for the British Lions. ;)
  • edited March 2015 Posts: 1,778
    Guess who's back!
    My apologies for the prolonged absence. I won't bore you all with details but all I'll say is it was a pretty hectic last 6 weeks. But now I figure it's time to bring this thread back up to speed. And to those above who've continued to post, my thanks to you for keeping this thread alive. Now shall we continue.
    As the countdown begins to the new millennium there is still one number you can always count on in,
    Things We've Learned from…..The World is Not Enough

    1) 16 minutes is entirely too long for a PTS.

    2) Swiss bankers only hire the hottest of secretaries

    3) Apparently Bond's eyeballs are immune to flash bang explosions, even ones 2 feet away from him.

    4) The credits really should've started after Bond jumped out the window.

    5) In just one film Moneypenny went from giving Bond the cold shoulder and threatning to bring him up on sexual harassment charges to hoping that he will ask her to marry him. Women huh?

    6) M will ring up Moneypenny and order her to "Stop King" despite the fact that Moneypenny is only in the next room over and that Bond had already begin sprinting towards King and was almost certainly closer to him.

    7) Renard ordered Cigar Girl to scope out MI6 from a boat just in case King survived the explosion that completely demolished a entire vault and decided that his best course of action would be to crawl out of the gapping hole in the wall on the umpteenth floor of MI6 headquarters.

    8) Q placed a ramp on the umpteenth floor of MI6 for his retirement boat just in case he ever had to rocket himself out of the building in a rush.

    9) When on a hot-air balloon if Cigar Girl is unable to hit Bond with one bullet after one try she will immediately give up and blow herself up.

    10) All it takes to get a government appointed physician to lie for you is throw a little sex her way and promise to call her back…this time.

    11) Evidently you can fit an American Gladiators-like giant hamster ball inside of a winter jacket.

    12) The filmmakers found a way to make John Cleese insufferable and annoying.

    13) The tiny night-lights on Bond's watch are enough to completely illuminate his giant safety ball.

    14) Before heading off to the casino Bond will assure Electra that she'll be safe in her house despite the fact that just earlier in the day he arrived with the sole purpose of telling her that there's an insider in her staff.

    15) Bond will begrudgingly turn Electra down only minutes before having sex with her until the early morning. :-?

    16) Denise Richards was cast for the sole purpose of the producers thinking Tanya Roberts was not unrealistic enough as a geologist and that Teri Hatcher wasn't a crummy enough actress. Richards was their attempt to remedy both problems.

    17) Christmas Jones raided Lara Croft's wardrobe.

    18) Pierce Brosnan perfected his Russian accent from the Saturday Night Live school of acting.

    19) Bond can put out the fire on the back of his jacket simply by thinking of it.

    20) James Bond, the same cool as ice, sharp as a razor secret agent who's bested femme fatals like Fiona Vulpe and Xenia Onnatop can be easily reduced to a sentimental fool and be played like a fiddle by Electra.

    21) Bond will park his super cool spy car in plain sight for Valentine's goons to see.

    22) For the second time in three films the movie will introduce an awesome gadget-laden car only to have Bond barely use it.

    23) Evidently before meeting with Valentine and Christmas, Bond went to a 1980s themed costume party dressed as Sonny Crockett.

    24) Electra is the jealous type.

    25) Valentine was awesome.

    26) M will psychically know that Bond was brought to Electra's base, escaped her clutches, and was on the staircase outside of her cell.

    27) Brosnan's Bond had a very bizarre fetish with dead bodies.

    28) Bond can hold his breath for a really really long time.

    29) The film will forgo any kind of emotional resonance Electra's death had on Bond in favor of cheesy yule tide sex pun.

    30) The late great Desmond Llewelyn was an absolute legend and will never ever even come close to being replaced.
    All hail the one and only Q ^:)^
  • MayDayDiVicenzoMayDayDiVicenzo Here and there
    Posts: 5,080
    suavejmf wrote: »
    The first hour of is great, but as soon as he undertakes the Halo jump....the film becomes an excuse for action sequences with little or no engaging story. The score is good too.
    This is a bottom 5 film for me.

    Not the purpose of this thread.

  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    31: Valentine makes comments about submarines seem like innuendos.
  • Posts: 1,778
    31: Valentine makes comments about submarines seem like innuendos.

    =))
    I can't tell you how embarrassed I am for never picking up on that.
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,249
    2) Swiss bankers only hire the hottest of secretaries
    I don't know if it is standard operating procedure out there, but when I visited a Swiss bank some time ago I had the pleasure of meeting a banking assistant who'd give Cigar Girl a run for her money. so perhaps they actually do this on purpose..

    32. Valentine Zukovski has a greater sense of humour then Bond does.
    33. Pay-offs in his casino are blatantly obvious.
    34. his security staff don't mind anyone in there carrying weapons. Walking around with x-ray glasses you might get the impression you were in an armoury.
    35. X-ray glasses look through top-clothing only.
  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    36: Bond remembers his family motto, but nothing else from the 60s. Yet.
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    edited March 2015 Posts: 23,883
    37. That PB would have a far shorter and critically less successful tenure as Bond than was initially presumed
    38. That M should not bring her motherly instincts to the job or be allowed in the field again (they did not learn this lesson sadly)
    39. That Carlyle's Renard makes watching paint dry interesting and was valiantly attempting to wrestle the award for most boring villain in the series from Glover's Kristatos
    40. That Halle Berry is not the worst actress to appear in a PB Bond film by a long shot
    41. That it is actually possible to have a dull ski sequence in a movie
    42. That Garbage can live up to their name
    43. That Davidov, Gabor & Bullion were possibly conceived to humiliate a franchise that heretofore was known for especially interesting, charismatic villains
    44. That Turkey and the Bosphorous can actually be made to look dull and unimaginative on film
    45. That the screenwriters and director of this debacle should not be let near a Bond movie again
  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    The writers haven't left, sadly.
  • edited March 2015 Posts: 7,507
    36: Bond remembers his family motto, but nothing else from the 60s. Yet.
    bondjames wrote: »
    37. That PB would have a far shorter and critically less successful tenure as Bond than was initially presumed
    38. That M should not bring her motherly instincts to the job or be allowed in the field again (they did not learn this lesson sadly)
    39. That Carlyle's Renard makes watching paint dry interesting and was valiantly attempting to wrestle the award for most boring villain in the series from Glover's Kristatos
    40. That Halle Berry is not the worst actress to appear in a PB Bond film by a long shot
    41. That it is actually possible to have a dull ski sequence in a movie
    42. That Garbage can live up to their name
    43. That Davidov, Gabor & Bullion were possibly conceived to humiliate a franchise that heretofore was known for especially interesting, charismatic villains
    44. That Turkey and the Bosphorous can actually be made to look dull and unimaginative on film
    45. That the screenwriters and director of this debacle should not be let near a Bond movie again

    =D> =D>

    46. When Q goes fishing he uses some interesting equipment. Torpedoes no less… Or maybe they are used to eliminate competition from other fishermen?
    47. He also makes sure the boat is super fast, agile and can go under water... so he can race the fish and catch them in his hands presumably...
  • Posts: 1,977
    TWINE was enough.
  • suavejmfsuavejmf Harrogate, North Yorkshire, England
    Posts: 5,131
    That Christmas cums more than once a year.
  • Posts: 9,846
    48 Denise Richards is gorgeous
    49 a cool and suspenseful murder mystery plot will be dropped half way through the film in exchange for a run of the mill stop the bomb plot
    50. This was the first bond film I saw in theaters
    51. Good to know Mi6 hires doctors with ridiculous sounding last names poor Molly must have been teased to death
    52. Denise Richards was the hottest and my favorite Bond girl till Eva Green showed up
    53. Christmas jokes are not funny
    54. John Cleese is also not funny
  • suavejmfsuavejmf Harrogate, North Yorkshire, England
    Posts: 5,131
    John Clease's Q is appaling, agreed.
  • suavejmfsuavejmf Harrogate, North Yorkshire, England
    Posts: 5,131
    Or R if were being picky!
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy My Secret Lair
    Posts: 13,384
    When I first heard of John Cleese as R, I thought it was a great idea because.
    I thought he was going to be a Whitehall money man, aghast and complaining
    About how expensive Bond's equipment was and how much he destroyed. As
    A one film only character.
  • DrShatterhandDrShatterhand Garden of Death, near Belfast
    edited March 2015 Posts: 805
    55. Swiss banks don't have to just hand back money if it's proven their client is a criminal dealing in stolen reports that have led to the death of an MI6 agent.
    56. To get the money back from the Swiss bank, you have to send someone in person...to Spain.
    57. The money can't be transferred electronically, only in cash.
    58. We're only a few minutes into the PTS and it's already painfully clear that story-telling isn't a strong suit of the screen-writers.
    59. Bond has a poor sense of hygiene as he doesn't wash his hands once on the flight/drive home from Bilbao.
    60. Parahawks are nowhere near as exciting as they sound
    61. Never to watch this drivel ever again.
  • Posts: 5,993

    30) The late great Desmond Llewelyn was an absolute legend and will never ever even come close to being replaced.
    All hail the one and only Q ^:)^

    Seconded. A great final scene. Especially compared to what Moneypenny went through in the next movie X(

    My turn :

    31) R hasn't quite forgotten his days in the Ministry of Silly Walks, it seems.

    32) M stands for McGuyver.

    33) Thank God Tomorrow was not in this movie.
  • KerimKerim Istanbul Not Constantinople
    Posts: 2,629
    62. Nuclear physicists can barely pass high school and wear clothing suitable for streetwalking at night.
    63. Even Bond can't escape high school teenage drama.
    64. You would think M would have learned to stay in the office.
    65. Pierce has a fetish with dead women.
    66. The one instance you wish the Y2K bug would have been successful.
    67. Cigar Girl's body was not done justice in TWINE.
    68. Desmond is irreplaceable.

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