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Explain a Bond Film Plot Badly

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  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,835
    YOLT: Bond travels to Japan where he goes overboard immersing himself in the culture and finds a volcano that swallows spaceships and almost goes into space himself except he doesn't because Flint already been there & done that.
  • jobojobo
    Posts: 7,507
    TB: Bond has a high speed fight with rocket man onboard a disco cruise
  • mattjoesmattjoes Pay more attention to your chef
    edited October 2017 Posts: 7,058
    AVTAK: The story of a businessman who tries to rise to the top of the market of microchips, while dealing with opposition from the British and Soviet governments and an intense relationship with his personal assistant.
  • WalecsWalecs On Her Majesty's Secret Service
    Posts: 3,157
    Fire_and_Ice_Returns wrote: »
    Spectre and Skyfall two brothers who are not brothers try to kill each other.

    :))
  • jobojobo
    edited October 2017 Posts: 7,507
    AVTAK: Crazy german machine gun enthusiast ends life with a good laugh
  • mattjoesmattjoes Pay more attention to your chef
    edited October 2017 Posts: 7,058
    MR: A rich industrialist attempts to wipe out the world population and create a human master race in space, but dies because man can't breathe in space.
  • Fire_and_Ice_ReturnsFire_and_Ice_Returns I am trying to get away from this mountan!
    Posts: 25,435
    Goldeneye Spoilers: 006 does not really die in the pre title sequence.
  • united1878united1878
    Posts: 92
    LTK- this time, it's personal
    GE- this time, it's personal
    CR- this time, it's personal
    QOS- this time, it's personal
    SF- this time, it's personal
    SP- this time, it's personal
  • vzokvzok
    Posts: 4,045
    DAD: Bond endures 14 months of torture, while we listen to Madonna.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,835
    Hahahahahaha!!! Nice.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Pay more attention to your chef
    Posts: 7,058
    Never Say Never Again: Sean Connery tries to reclaim the Bond crown, but finds he can't beat Sir Roger friggin' Moore.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 17,835
    NSNA: Bond perves a blond babe and a brunette babe perves him... Mr. Bean approves!
  • M_BaljeM_Balje Amsterdam, Netherlands
    Posts: 4,538
    GF: What are you doing there on that farm the whole day ? Walking around do nothing walk again.. stil searching, but not found any gold yet.
    DAF: Amsterdam what are you doing there ? Taking a boat trip, visiting Amsterdam canals, let my self over ride by a bike. I was taking some overdue holiday.
    Live and Let Die: New Orleans what are you doing there as White Guy ?!
    AVTAK: Paris What are you doing there, searching for Mickey Mouse ??
  • vzokvzok
    Posts: 4,045
    M_Balje wrote: »
    GF: What are you doing there on that farm the whole day ? Walking around do nothing walk again.. stil searching, but not found any gold yet.
    DAF: Amsterdam what are you doing there ? Taking a boat trip, visiting Amsterdam canals, let my self over ride by a bike. I was taking some overdue holiday.
    Live and Let Die: New Orleans what are you doing there as White Guy ?!
    AVTAK: Paris What are you doing there, searching for Mickey Mouse ??

    Blofeld: We all know Mickey Mouse is at the Spectre meeting. Cuckoo.
  • SirHilaryBraySirHilaryBray Scotland
    Posts: 2,138
    Dr No - One handed white man pretends to be Chinese, scares locals off his island with tales of Dragons.

    From Russia With Love - Two Nations and corrupt Organisation fight over a typewriter.

    Goldfinger - Obesity Kills

    Thunderball - Man with eye patch rules the sea's but isn't a pirate!

    YOLT - Agent seeks help of strange man whole lives like a Ninja Turtle in Japanese subway.

    OHMSS - Big Brother Season 1

    Diamonds are Forever - Fat man in wig seeks clone.

    Live & Let Die - Man with identify issues seeks clairvoyant's virginity.

    TMWTGG - An elderly gentleman and his midget friend take solar power energy saving to a new extreme.




  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    edited October 2017 Posts: 15,423
    TMWTGG: Dracula-looking fella has a golden gun made of writing, wearing and smoking tools with glorified gold plates, and wants to be the best killer in the world by killing James Bond because the film gods make them all believe Bond is the best in his world. Frank Scaramaga wants to takeover, using a solex agitator thingy to his advantage.
  • Last_Rat_StandingLast_Rat_Standing Long Neck Ice Cold Beer Never Broke My Heart
    Posts: 4,602
    AVTAK- 20 something year old geologist loves when old men drop the soap
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    edited October 2017 Posts: 28,694
    You can always count on the Bond films to tell you what kinds of people to watch out for in life.

    Dr. No: Disabled people are evil.

    From Russia with Love: Lesbians and Aryan-looking Europeans are evil.

    Goldfinger: Fat people are evil.

    Thunderball: Disabled people are still evil.

    You Only Live Twice: People with dueling scars are evil.

    Diamonds Are Forever: Gay men are evil too.

    Live & Let Die: Black people are evil.

    The Man with the Golden Gun: Midgets are evil.

    The Spy Who Loved Me: People with hand deformities are evil.

    Moonraker: People who think they're Shakespeare are evil.

    Goldeneye: All good friends and coworkers are destined to be evil.

    Tomorrow Never Dies: The media is evil (the only one in this list with any validity?).

    The World is Not Enough: Beautiful women are evil.

    Die Another Day: People who get plastic surgery are evil.

    Casino Royale: Mathematicians are evil, but really evil if they have a bad eye. Still have to beware of beautiful women.

    Quantum: Environmentalists are evil.

    Skyfall: Sexually undefined men are evil.

    Spectre: People who wear shoes without socks are evil.
  • Fire_and_Ice_ReturnsFire_and_Ice_Returns I am trying to get away from this mountan!
    edited October 2017 Posts: 25,435
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote: »
    You can always count on the Bond films to tell you what kinds of people to watch out for in life.

    Dr. No: Disabled people are evil.

    From Russia with Love: Lesbians and Aryan-looking Europeans are evil.

    Goldfinger: Fat people are evil.

    Thunderball: Disabled people are still evil.

    You Only Live Twice: People with dueling scars are evil.

    Diamonds Are Forever: Gay men are evil too.

    Live & Let Die: Black people are evil.

    The Man with the Golden Gun: Midgets are evil.

    The Spy Who Loved Me: People with hand deformities are evil.

    Moonraker: People who think they're Shakespeare are evil.

    Goldeneye: All good friends and coworkers are destined to be evil.

    Tomorrow Never Dies: The media is evil (the only one in this list with any validity?).

    The World is Not Enough: Beautiful women are evil.

    Die Another Day: People who get plastic surgery are evil.

    Casino Royale: Mathematicians are evil, but really evil if they have a bad eye. Still have to beware of beautiful women.

    Quantum: Environmentalists are evil.

    Skyfall: Sexually undefined men are evil.

    Spectre: People who wear shoes without socks are evil.

    :))

    Spectre People who wear slippers are evil

    CSK_13421_0018_002_-_Edited.jpg
  • StrogStrog
    edited October 2017 Posts: 684
    TSWLM: A man falls in love with the girlfriend of the man he killed and, in order to impress her, pretends to be a marine biologist.

    george2.jpg
    "The sea was angry that day, my friends. Like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli."
  • SirHilaryBraySirHilaryBray Scotland
    Posts: 2,138
    Octopussy - Bond gets to see 8 hairy vaginas
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    TSWLM-a guy loves fish and hates people.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    TSWLM - Bond is pitted against a grumpy old mermaid.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    The Spy Who Loved Me: James Bond makes love to a plank of wood.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    MR-a guy needs some more space.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    edited October 2017 Posts: 15,423
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote: »
    The Spy Who Loved Me: James Bond makes love to a plank of wood.
    Most accurate.

    Moonraker - James Bond teams up with a sleepwalker and takes her around the world twice.
  • suavejmfsuavejmf Harrogate, North Yorkshire, England
    Posts: 5,131
    OHMSS: A player falls in love and gets married. But she is shot in the head on the special day.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    CR-some guys play card. One of them is a really bad loser.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    YOLT - Bond goes Japanese to sneak into a bald man's fake volcano hideout.
  • jobojobo
    Posts: 7,507
    Thunderfinger wrote: »
    CR-some guys play card. One of them is a really bad loser.


    Aren't they both of them?
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