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Explain a Bond Film Plot Badly

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  • peterpeter Toronto
    edited October 2018 Posts: 9,509
    Casino Royale: this guy becomes 007 — whatever the Mod Edit that means— and he plays poker until some guy gets pissed off and busts his balls. Then his lady dies and he shoots an old guy in the leg.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,588
    SP: James Bond has sex with Monica Bellucci. Other stuff happens.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    TB: Some red tattoo leads James Bond to unraveling a doomsday plot.
  • RichardTheBruceRichardTheBruce I'm motivated by my Duty.
    Posts: 13,814
    Goldfinger: no one has a gold finger. Well, almost no one. And then it's fingers.
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    Birdleson wrote: »
    AVTAK: Bond enjoys Fleet Week in San Francisco. Almost falls off of one of the local bridges.
    TLD: Bond misses. Deliberately. Enables Bin Laden.

    oh very well done-- especially TLD, lol!
  • mattjoesmattjoes Julie T. and the M.G.'s
    Posts: 7,021
    peter wrote: »
    Casino Royale: this guy becomes 007 — whatever the Mod Edit that means— and he plays poker until some guy gets pissed off and busts his balls. Then his lady dies and he shoots an old guy in the leg.

    Mod Edit? Hmm, I wonder if I could I write that phrase here and there and make you bunch of pathetic Mod Edit think I'm a foul-mouthed Mod Edit? No, you can't. You're pushing your luck.



    Disclaimer: I've been strongly advised by my legal team to explicitly tell you all the above has been a joke, not to be repeated in the future.
  • LegionnaireLegionnaire
    Posts: 142
    GF: Fat man is sucked through a window, while Pussy fly’s.
  • TorgeirtrapTorgeirtrap
    edited October 2018 Posts: 17,759
    QBranch wrote: »
    SP: James Bond has sex with Monica Bellucci. Other stuff happens.

    Sums up that film quite well actually!
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    thunderball:

    There's this creepy guy that hides behind a frosty window, electrocutes people and steals planes with bombs and Bond punches a widow who's really a dude.
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    Octopussy:

    James Bond flies out of a horse's arse and into the arms of a chick called Octopussy, who has a pet octopus, just as a bomb is about to go off on a U.S. airbase somewhere not in the u.s. And there's a golden egg in it.
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    mattjoes wrote: »
    peter wrote: »
    Casino Royale: this guy becomes 007 — whatever the Mod Edit that means— and he plays poker until some guy gets pissed off and busts his balls. Then his lady dies and he shoots an old guy in the leg.

    Mod Edit? Hmm, I wonder if I could I write that phrase here and there and make you bunch of pathetic Mod Edit think I'm a foul-mouthed Mod Edit? No, you can't. You're pushing your luck.



    Disclaimer: I've been strongly advised by my legal team to explicitly tell you all the above has been a joke, not to be repeated in the future.

    You don't want to try-- trust me. I disguised my foul word, I thought, brilliantly. But alas, it was indeed discovered and the electrical device that all Mi6 members have implanted in them was used on me.

    I've been on the toilet ever since.
  • LegionnaireLegionnaire
    Posts: 142
    TB: After going down, Bond eats girl. She cries.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 3,000
    DAF: The other fella comes back and seemingly forgets the previous movie.
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    Legionnaire wrote: »
    TB: After going down, Bond eats girl. She cries.

    @Legionnaire:

    Yes. Internet just broke. And I woke. Well done.
  • SaintMarkSaintMark
    Posts: 7,653
    QoS - Jason Bourne fired the editor of his movies and now stuff happens in a Bond movie that make no sense.
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    This guy who was gambling gets flown out to Jamaica to have dinner with a Dr who has metal hands.
  • mgeoff88mgeoff88 At a nice safehouse in Rome... Erm... Bay Area, CA
    edited October 2018 Posts: 50
    FYEO - A spy goes to Greece to help a Greek woman avenge her family, and climbs a mountain to save an ice skater in the process.
  • TorgeirtrapTorgeirtrap
    edited October 2018 Posts: 17,759
    FYEO – A spy must resist the sexual advances of an ice-skater whilst trying to locate a missing transmitter – keeping it out of the hands of the Soviets.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 3,000
    TMWTGG: A super villain has the power to shoot incredibly accurately thanks to his magic third nipple. He also has a midget sidekick for some reason.
  • RichardTheBruceRichardTheBruce I'm motivated by my Duty.
    Posts: 13,814
    Dr. No. Honey. Yes.
  • RoadphillRoadphill United Kingdom
    Posts: 984
    Spectre: Some bloke's Dad likes Bond more than he does him.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    OP: Clown disguise helps a spy infiltrate a military base and defuse a bomb.
  • SaintMarkSaintMark
    Posts: 7,653
    ClarkDevlin wrote: »
    OP: Clown disguise helps a spy infiltrate a military base and defuse a bomb.

    I did understand and recognized that from OP, well explained.
  • TorgeirtrapTorgeirtrap
    edited October 2018 Posts: 17,759
    OHMSS – Spy poses as a genealogist at a research institute in the Swiss Alps, using his cover to sleep around with allergic women – angering the proprietor of the institute.
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    Torgeirtrap wrote: »
    OHMSS – Spy poses as a genealogist at a research institute in the Swiss Alps, using his cover to sleep around with allergic women – angering the proprietor of the institute.

    Ha! You're very good at these @Torgeirtrap
  • TorgeirtrapTorgeirtrap
    Posts: 17,759
    peter wrote: »
    Torgeirtrap wrote: »
    OHMSS – Spy poses as a genealogist at a research institute in the Swiss Alps, using his cover to sleep around with allergic women – angering the proprietor of the institute.

    Ha! You're very good at these @Torgeirtrap

    Thanks! I've only done two of these though; doubt I'll be able to make one for each film!
  • peterpeter Toronto
    Posts: 9,509
    @Torgeirtrap -- 2/2

    FYEO was excellent and OHMSS was running with the same punchy high-quality.

    Take your time and make it 3/3!... And eventually...

    ... 24/24-- you've got a fan in me, lol!
  • LegionnaireLegionnaire
    Posts: 142
    DN: Bond Honey Ryder, no doctor.
  • TorgeirtrapTorgeirtrap
    Posts: 17,759
    peter wrote: »
    @Torgeirtrap -- 2/2

    FYEO was excellent and OHMSS was running with the same punchy high-quality.

    Take your time and make it 3/3!... And eventually...

    ... 24/24-- you've got a fan in me, lol!

    I'l do my very best! Can't think of another one right now; will need to sleep on it!
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    edited October 2018 Posts: 15,423
    SaintMark wrote: »
    ClarkDevlin wrote: »
    OP: Clown disguise helps a spy infiltrate a military base and defuse a bomb.
    I did understand and recognized that from OP, well explained.
    Thank you!
    ---
    TND: A media baron wanted to popularize fake news before it was cool.
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