BondCapCon - No Friggin in the Riggin...Part Deux

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  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,680
    Bond: "I know, I know. Japanese men have beautiful bare skin. Well, at least I'm not as hairy as that other fella."

    Tanaka: "Very true, Bondsan. Bird may never make nest in bare tree, but you are somewhere in between."
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    It was the thirty-first day in a row with nothing but heavy breathing on the line, and he thought he could detect a faint Australian accent.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    edited March 2019 Posts: 14,680
    M: "...and Bond...don't ever break into my house again."

    Bond: "Ma'am."

    M: "One more thing - I seem to be missing a pair of knickers with brown polka dots--"

    Bond: "I, uhh...I can't hear you M, the line's breaking up. Gotta go!"
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    "Yes? This is the James Bond sex phone."
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Tiger? I just called to say I love you.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Bond sometimes called Goodnight and asked her to check if the phone was plugged in.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Is that you, Oddjob?
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Franz? Hannes says hi and sorry the fridge is empty and sorry he cannot make it home tonight on your birthday, but he is tucking me in. Lovely cake.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    edited March 2019 Posts: 14,680
    Bond: "Hello? La Paz taxi service? Can I get a-"

    Cabbie: "...It either rains too much, or it never rains! They say the glaciers are melting. It's like the wrath of God!..."

    Bond: "Um, that's great. Now, can I get a-"

    Cabbie: "...I don't know when they're going to do something about it. My grandmother, may she rest in peace, told me everything..."

    Bond: "My condolences. We had nothing to do with it. Now, please send me a t-"

    Cabbie: "...every single thing about what's going on. I can still see her in my dreams. She's the one who says to me, "My boy, buy yourself a taxi..."

    Bond: "Look, I'm gonna be late for my appointment! Now send me a F---"

    Cabbie: "...And the government keeps raising taxes..."

    Bond: *sigh* "Then maybe you shouldn't be living HEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

    *throws phone; starts walking*
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Brosnan tried to figure out how to access Facebook on this phone.
  • 00Agent00Agent Any man who drinks Dom Perignon '52 can't be all bad.
    edited March 2019 Posts: 5,185
    Luigi: "Luigi's Pizza Palace..."

    Bond: "Yes, could you send some Beluga caviar and a bottle of Bollinger '53 to my address?"

    Luigi: "Is this a joke?"

    Bond: "No, and i need it in 30 min."

    Luigi: "Look pal, only what's on the menu..."

    Bond: "hmm, what else do you got?"

    Luigi: "We got anchovy Pizza in today's special..."

    Bond: "Ok nevermind."
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Some thought Brosnan was just phoning it in.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    "Good evening, Sir! Do you agree that James Bond cannot be blond? For just a small monthly fee, I can offer you a subscription to our magazine, or if you prefer a generous donation, a signed photograph of a real James Bond, delivered in person."
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,331
    But Pam, I AM the same guy.... Yes I look diff... now look.....beep...beep....beep
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Yes, Mom. JAMES BOND!!! I have ordered a million pounds worth of lip gloss, skin lotion and hairspray.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,680
    Broz: "Hello, 999? I have an emergency."

    Operator: "Hello, sir. Please state the department you nee- Wait. Pierce, is that you?"

    Broz: "Yep."

    Operator: "Let me guess, you superglued yourself to the phone again."

    Broz: "Yep."

    Operator: "Okay, we're sending an ambulance. Stay on the line please."

    Broz: "Yep."
  • j_w_pepperj_w_pepper Born on the bayou, but I now hear a new dog barkin'
    Posts: 9,083
    "Hello, James? My name is Najib, and I am calling from Microsoft Windows. We have discovered that you have a virus on your hard drive. Can you give us access to your computer? What, you say you have no computer? And it is only 1985? Oh...okay, my bad..."
  • 00Agent00Agent Any man who drinks Dom Perignon '52 can't be all bad.
    edited March 2019 Posts: 5,185
    "Hello, and good day to you Sir. I am a member of the Mi6community and would like to talk to you about our Lord and savior Sean Connery and his evil arch nemesis, the Brosnan. It would only take a moment."
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489

    Remington-Steele-1986-Suit.jpg
    Pierce gets the call from Barbara.
    hqdefault.jpg

  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,331
    Runner up:
    Tiger? I just called to say I love you.

    Can't get the bl***** song out of my head now.

    And the winner:
    QBranch wrote: »
    Bond: "Hello? La Paz taxi service? Can I get a-"

    Cabbie: "...It either rains too much, or it never rains! They say the glaciers are melting. It's like the wrath of God!..."

    Bond: "Um, that's great. Now, can I get a-"

    Cabbie: "...I don't know when they're going to do something about it. My grandmother, may she rest in peace, told me everything..."

    Bond: "My condolences. We had nothing to do with it. Now, please send me a t-"

    Cabbie: "...every single thing about what's going on. I can still see her in my dreams. She's the one who says to me, "My boy, buy yourself a taxi..."

    Bond: "Look, I'm gonna be late for my appointment! Now send me a F---"

    Cabbie: "...And the government keeps raising taxes..."

    Bond: *sigh* "Then maybe you shouldn't be living HEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

    *throws phone; starts walking*

  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,680
    Many thanks, Rossy! I'll try to get a pic up soon.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    QBranch wrote: »
    Many thanks, Rossy! I'll try to get a pic up soon.

    patrol-pickup-selector.jpg.ximg.l_3_m.smart.jpg
    Here you go.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,680
    Here you go.
    Haha, took me a minute to figure that out.


    Alright folks, here we go:

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  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    And you know what? As co-producer I have a private casting couch!
  • 00Agent00Agent Any man who drinks Dom Perignon '52 can't be all bad.
    Posts: 5,185
    "Omg look at all this delicious food, and in only 7 more month from now i can have some of it again."
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    After the shoot, Javier snuck up behind me in the shower. He must have been about this size.
  • 00Agent00Agent Any man who drinks Dom Perignon '52 can't be all bad.
    Posts: 5,185
    I said "i would rather slash my wrists then do another one" in an interview, and Barbara got so freaked out about it that she gave me a ridiculous amount of money just to stay on for another movie and now i've been throwing these huge parties in my house every week....

    Guy on the right: Hey that's great! Though i really don't know who you are or what you're talking about, but thanks for letting me in here anyway. The food is delicious!
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    ALCOHOL!
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 8,331
    I swear they were this big after that CR scene!
  • DeerAtTheGatesDeerAtTheGates Belgium
    Posts: 524
    You know, that reanimation scene at the end of Casino Royale? I only did that to have the opportunity to feel Eva Green's...
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