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BondCapCon - No Friggin in the Riggin...Part Deux

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  • SoundofthesinnersSoundofthesinners
    Posts: 3,236
    "If I had a dime for the number of times I didn't look like the height of suavity, I'd have this many."
  • RogueAgentRogueAgent
    Posts: 12,526
    QBranch wrote:
    Thanks for being patient, folks. Having trouble finding a good pic... but let's try this one:

    Sir-Roger-Moore.jpg

    Dear old Roger's audition as Spock in the 3rd Star Trek movie goes seriously wrong!
  • SoundofthesinnersSoundofthesinners
    Posts: 3,236
    The thread seems to have gone a bit cold. Anybody else?
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,566
    Been pretty much offline for the past week as my internet was playing up. Good work to everyone here. Judging this in 24 hours.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,566
    Alright folks, time to get this moving again. Great work to all who contributed. Here's the verdict:

    Honourables:
    Murdock wrote:
    Roger Moore as James Bond Zero Zero 7 in Zero Minus 10.
    We got off to a good start with @Murdock's clever caption (I would love Zero Minus Ten for a future film title)
    Soundofthesinners wrote:
    "If I had a dime for the number of times I didn't look like the height of suavity, I'd have this many."
    Hear hear. Quite the epitome.

    3RD PLACE:
    0BradyM0Bondfanatic7 wrote:
    Roger: "This is how many bloody f@#$s I give."
    How funny would it be hearing Rog' say this!

    2ND PLACE:
    4EverBonded wrote:
    Roger was none too happy to wake up after the big Skyfall party (the secret bash, not the one everybody knows about) to find three new tattoos on his body. He clearly did not remember requesting to have these done. In this photo is the first "zero", on his other palm is the other "zero" and the numeral "7' was, well let's just say discovered in a very private area, to Roger's dismay. "To think it used to be my favorite number!" he sighed.
    Poor Roger. Someone really did a num6er on him.

    1ST PLACE:
    WillyGalore wrote:
    "On a scale of 1-10, how high would you rate the sexual prowess of Grace Jones?"
    @Willy's acting nonchalant, but we all know he's waiting for her to take care of him 'personally'.

    Congrats, champ. The round is yours. =D>
  • WillyGaloreWillyGalore
    Posts: 6,396
    Many thanks @QBranch. I hate trying to find a funny photo. There's too much pressure :-)

    Let's see how you all get on with this:

    Pierce%2BBrosnan%2BPierce%2BBrosnan%2BEmma%2BThompson%2BOXc2G8EQL-yl.jpg
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    "So you live to dive another day."
  • MrcogginsMrcoggins Following in the footsteps of Quentin Quigley.
    Posts: 3,144
    Looks like we're going down together .
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,566
    WillyGalore wrote:
    I hate trying to find a funny photo.
    I know you do. But that's totally NOT the reason I chose you as the winner... ;)
    Mrcoggins wrote:
    Looks like we're going down together .
    Darn it. Just beat me to it.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,566
    Woman: "Pierce! You're not fully suited up yet! Are you coming diving with me or not?"

    Brosnan: "Just getting some sun on my skin, dear. Rule number one: Never give a shark the cold shoulder."
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    Pierce: "What are you up to on this splendid day, love?"

    Scuba diver: "Me? Just going to do some deep-sea diving."

    Pierce: "Ah, very nice. Very nice indeed. Listen, how about you scrap all this and come on over for a drink at my oceanside villa?"

    Scuba diver: "That is very kind of you, and I'm flattered and all, but I must decline."

    Pierce: "Did I mention I had an oceanside villa?"

    Scuba diver: "I've got too much work to get done, I'm sorry. My schedule's just jam-packed, honestly."

    Pierce: "OCEANFRONT VILLA. Do you hear the words that are coming out of my mouth?"

    Scuba diver: "I'm sure it's nice and all, but please, I must be going."

    Pierce: "I mean, I've got pictures if you don't believe me..."

    [Woman walks off, leaving Pierce alone with half a mojito, his tears the only company he'll be having that day]
  • WillyGaloreWillyGalore
    Posts: 6,396
    That's not just any woman @QBranch, that's Dame Emma Thompson :-)
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    edited February 2014 Posts: 28,694
    Sorry about the double post.
  • RogueAgentRogueAgent
    Posts: 12,526
    WillyGalore wrote:
    Many thanks @QBranch. I hate trying to find a funny photo. There's too much pressure :-)

    Let's see how you all get on with this:

    Pierce%2BBrosnan%2BPierce%2BBrosnan%2BEmma%2BThompson%2BOXc2G8EQL-yl.jpg

    I think we are taking this whole safe sex thing perhaps a step too far love?!!!
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,566
    WillyGalore wrote:
    That's not just any woman @QBranch, that's Dame Emma Thompson :-)
    Aha, I thought it looked like her. My apologies.
  • SoundofthesinnersSoundofthesinners
    Posts: 3,236
    Emma: Pierce, what are you doing? You have to get suit your on!

    Pierce: And who says we can't invent skinny scuba diving?
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 40,963
    Pierce: "I like to get SUITED UP before I get WET." *smirks*
    Woman: "Ohh..."
    Pierce: "Yeahhh, I prefer proper attire before I go DOWN on a woman. Get it? 'Cause, it's like, down, underwater, but it's a sexual pun at the same time, kind of. Do you...where are you going?"
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    edited February 2014 Posts: 28,694
    In a deleted scene from Die Another Day, Bond enters a Cuban dock filled with divers exploring the treasures of the sea:

    Bond [speaking to diver]: "Beautiful day, isn't it? I hope everything here is going...swimmingly.

    Scuba diver: "Humor will get you everywhere, Mr. Bond."

    Bond: "Oh, so you've heard of me?"

    Scuba diver: "Of course. You're all the rest of the girls have been talking about."

    Bond: "Girls? There's more of you?"

    [The diver points to a small boat full of gorgeous women preparing to dive into the sea]

    Scuba diver: "I can introduce you to them after we're done diving, if you'd like. I'm sure they'd take to you quite nicely."

    Bond: "I would like that very much. You know what they say? Sometimes the greatest treasures aren't always to be found under the ocean."

    Scuba diver: "Watch your words, Mr. Bond. Keep talking like that and we'll all be ravishing you with mad passion. You've never had so many women at once before, I'm sure."

    Bond: "No, it'd be quite the treat. Do you think your fellow...colleagues would oblige me?"

    Scuba diver: "I'm sure we can working something out."

    Bond [gazing out at the small boat the girls are piling on]: "Most excellent. But I do think one little fix is in order."

    Scuba diver: "Oh? What's that?"

    Bond: "We're gonna need a bigger boat."

    [Bond theme plays]
  • WillyGaloreWillyGalore
    Posts: 6,396
    Loving these so far. Perhaps my best choice of photo so far. :D
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    edited February 2014 Posts: 12,480
    Pierce: "Emma, I'd much prefer that you wear this "off-the-shoulders" dive suit to our Octopussy's Garden Party; not me."

    Emma; "You know we have to wear the costumes we were given, Pierce! Damn, I can't get these gloves off."

    Pierce (with his warm, sexy voice): "Put your back into it."

    Emma (glancing up at him with a wry smile): "Yes. Considerably. OK ... give me another mojito, Pierce, and we can see about that. I see a cozy dive shack just over there ... or do you think we're trapped into going to this stupid party? "

    Pierce: "Trapped?" - takes a sip, then looks her right in the eyes.
    "Never."

    And they manage to ditch the suits and find their way to the dive shack, no problem. Mission accomplished.
  • SoundofthesinnersSoundofthesinners
    Posts: 3,236
    Pierce: Emma, I really don't think we need a whole scuba suit for just this glass of water. Besides, it's messed up my hair something terrible.
  • YojimboYojimbo
    Posts: 22
    Don't worry folks. Pierce knows what he's doing. He's only scuba diving waist-deep.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    George Lazenby left his newly spray-painted car for five minutes to buy a keg of beer. Upon his return he saw that Irish brat Pierce Brosnan leaning against it in a moist wetsuit. George had never run so fast or punched so hard in his entire life.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    Diver: "You look a little upset, Pierce. What is wrong, darling?"

    Pierce: "I'm just a little..sad."

    Diver: "Is it me? Is it something I've done? Am I not as exciting as all those land girls?"

    Pierce: "No, no, no, don't talk crazy like that. It's just... I was promised Jacqueline Bisset in a wet t-shirt. I've been here for five bloody hours now, waiting hopelessly for my childhood fantasy to be realized."
  • SoundofthesinnersSoundofthesinners
    Posts: 3,236
    Pierce: You know, Emma, this is a really good look for me. If only I'd gotten a role in Bond 24, this outfit would have turned the series around faster than that hack Daniel Craig and his "brutality" and "vulnerability".

    Emma: Right, well, you get your suit on, and I'll buy you an ice cream.
  • Baltimore_007Baltimore_007
    Posts: 5,634
    Brosnan - 'Do you have the Bends ?'

    Woman - 'No wonder you wear glasses Mr Brosnan. That's a Citroen, and you're sitting on the freakin' thing'
  • WillyGaloreWillyGalore
    Posts: 6,396
    I'll judge this when I'm better. May be the week after next, so have patience. :-)
  • MrcogginsMrcoggins Following in the footsteps of Quentin Quigley.
    Posts: 3,144
    Brosnan. While you're down there ! and don't forget to exhale all the way up.
  • KerimKerim Istanbul Not Constantinople
    edited February 2014 Posts: 2,629
    Pierce: "Diving for muffs Emma"?

    Emma: "It could go for $50 in Miami".
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    Pierce: "How are you doing, love?"

    Scuba diver: "Lovely. I'm just going into the deep. You?"

    Pierce: "Oh, I went into the deep many times in my day. Still do, when the opportunity arises."

    Scuba diver: "You dive?"

    Pierce: "Diving? Heavens no, I was talking about sex."
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