BondCapCon - No Friggin in the Riggin...Part Deux

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  • MurdockMurdock The minus world
    Posts: 16,351
    Pierce: Why did I agree to dress up as Michael Caine from Jaws: The Revenge?
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    edited February 2014 Posts: 14,584
    Pierce%2BBrosnan%2BPierce%2BBrosnan%2BEmma%2BThompson%2BOXc2G8EQL-yl.jpg

    Emma: "The water pressure must have affected my balance, because I almost walked into that long white pole in front of me."

    Brosnan: "Yes, it's quite a safety hazard. By the way, watch out for that tent post just there."
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    " That was a nice swim, PB."

    "Yes, it rather was, err..ET."
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    edited March 2014 Posts: 28,694
    Pierce: "Hello there, beautiful. You know, that water's not the only thing that could make you wet today." :>

    [Pierce is slapped fiercely by the woman, who then walks away in a fit of rage]

    Pierce: "I've always loved the feisty ones. You just let me know if you ever need some mouth to mouth resuscitation, love."
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    Pierce: "Hey there, love. Wanna plunder my booty?"

    [Girl ignores him]


    Pierce: "Wanna be my rubber ducky in this ocean of love?"

    [Girl continues to ignore him]


    Pierce: "Wanna have sea sex where only the fishies are witnesses to our passionate love-making?"

    [Girl still ignores him]


    Pierce: "Playing hard to get, I see. That's quite alright; I do love a challenge, after all...

    [After a few brief moments of silence, Pierce suddenly begins to shout hysterically, pointing behind him]

    Oh no! Look, it's the end of the world! Tsunamis are ravishing cities on the coast, earthquakes are splitting countries into pieces and volcanoes are wiping away human life in droves of seething hot lava! Quick, let's repopulate the earth together as God intended!"

    [Girl dives into the ocean without acknowledging his presence]


    Pierce: "Dammit, I thought that'd work. Note to self: lead with that end of the world bit first next time..."
  • Is it judging time yet, @WillyGalore?
  • Posts: 6,396
    Sorry for the delay folks. I appreciate the patience you've had. Truth is, I'm still quite poorly and have got nerve damage on my left side of my face. Still can't open my eye.

    Anyway, I'll judge as best I can:

    5th Place:
    Kerim wrote:
    Pierce: "Diving for muffs Emma"?

    Emma: "It could go for $50 in Miami".
    4th Place:
    Brosnan - 'Do you have the Bends ?'

    Woman - 'No wonder you wear glasses Mr Brosnan. That's a Citroen, and you're sitting on the freakin' thing'

    3rd Place:
    QBranch wrote:

    Emma: "The water pressure must have affected my balance, because I almost walked into that long white pole in front of me."

    Brosnan: "Yes, it's quite a safety hazard. By the way, watch out for that tent post just there."

    2nd Place:
    "So you live to dive another day."

    And the Winner is:
    Pierce: "How are you doing, love?"

    Scuba diver: "Lovely. I'm just going into the deep. You?"

    Pierce: "Oh, I went into the deep many times in my day. Still do, when the opportunity arises."

    Scuba diver: "You dive?"

    Pierce: "Diving? Heavens no, I was talking about sex."

    Congrats @0Brady

  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    edited March 2014 Posts: 28,694
    Wow, thank you very much for the honor, @Willy.

    We haven't seen Sean on these pages in a while, so let's try this beauty out:

    13041256604_52c33659fa_b.jpg

    I can't wait to see what you all come up with. Judging in about a week from now.
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 40,976
    "Open up for my cream...err, I mean, my ice cream."
  • Posts: 6,396
    "Ah what's the matter General, cone you take a joke?"
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 40,976
    "Let me show you how Honey liked it..."
  • MajorDSmytheMajorDSmythe "I tolerate this century, but I don't enjoy it."Moderator
    edited March 2014 Posts: 13,978
    "Eat my ice cream, you mutha."
  • edited March 2014 Posts: 6,396
    "I shouldn't haven taken such a big bite Sean.
    I now have a Coldfinger"
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 40,976
    "Give me attitude one more time and I'll give you a Coldeneye."
  • edited March 2014 Posts: 6,396
    After searching for "Licking Sean's big cone" on Google, the result was not what I'd hoped for.
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    edited March 2014 Posts: 12,480
    "Thank you for putting your clothes on, General. Your naked entrance at our breakfast meeting was just too much ... er ... information. That really should be For Your Eyes Only, old boy. Anyway, I said I'd buy you an ice cream, so here you go! Enjoy!"
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    Freud would be quite proud of your phallic remarks, gentlemen. I love the turnout already, so do keep the jokers coming.
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 40,976
    "Come on, General, I know you can open it up wider than that."
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    Posts: 12,480
    Freud would be quite proud of your phallic remarks, gentlemen. I love the turnout already, so do keep the jokers coming.

    ... and lady. ;)
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 Quantum Floral Arrangements: "We Have Petals Everywhere"
    Posts: 28,694
    Freud would be quite proud of your phallic remarks, gentlemen. I love the turnout already, so do keep the jokers coming.

    ... and lady. ;)

    True, but your joke wasn't as...dickish (?) as some of the more naughty entries. Boys with toys and all that. ;)
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    edited March 2014 Posts: 12,480
    Yes, I see. Hmmm. Mine was just using an old Roger Moore line.
    Personally, I shudder to think where Creasy can further go with this "dickish" route ... !! (And no, I am not encouraging you, Creasy!) :-O
  • KerimKerim Istanbul Not Constantinople
    Posts: 2,629
    Gheneral, the privatesh have a preshent for shou. Now closhe your eyesh and open your mouth shand you shwill get a big surpishe. Ah, you lovesh the shweet and shour tashte just shlike Kim Basshinger did.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    edited March 2014 Posts: 14,584
    G.I. scream for ice cream!
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Das Boot Hill
    Posts: 45,489
    Few know that Sean also worked as a stage magician before his Bond career. As "The Wizard of Icecream" he would make icecream mysteriously disappear. Deep down he knew that he sucked, and so did his assistant.
  • Posts: 12,526
    Wow, thank you very much for the honor, @Willy.

    We haven't seen Sean on these pages in a while, so let's try this beauty out:

    13041256604_52c33659fa_b.jpg

    I can't wait to see what you all come up with. Judging in about a week from now.

    Sean is filled with glee as his assistant was not aware of the second ice cream that had just docked at another entry point!!!! 8-X
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 14,584
    Karaoke night at the Zukovskys was cut short after neighbours called the animal welfare. Happily, the society reports that no cats were actually strangled.
  • Posts: 6,396
    "51 flavours and the best you can come up with is vanilla, Sean?"
  • Sean enjoyed taunting the mounted corpse by holding up an ice cream and making sexual innuendos, to either the delight or concern of onlookers.
  • Posts: 6,396

    13041256604_52c33659fa_b.jpg

    Everyone was at a loss to explain why Sean had a tree growing out the top of his head.
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 40,976
    Yes, I see. Hmmm. Mine was just using an old Roger Moore line.
    Personally, I shudder to think where Creasy can further go with this "dickish" route ... !! (And no, I am not encouraging you, Creasy!) :-O

    Challenge accepted.

    General: "Ahh, vanilla, my favorite? Ahhhhhhh!"
    Connery: "Ohh, it's vanilla, alright. I just made it a few minutes ago in my trailer. Call it, 'Connery Homemade.'"
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