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Worst Lines in All of Bond

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  • WillyGaloreWillyGalore
    Posts: 6,396
    Another stinker from TWINE.

    "If you're Q, does that make him R?"
  • BAIN123BAIN123
    edited November 2015 Posts: 11,189
    WillyGalore wrote: »
    Another stinker from TWINE.

    "If you're Q, does that make him R?"

    I quite like that one.

    The one I dislike is "pipe down 007".
  • SJK91SJK91
    Posts: 1,310
    jobo wrote: »
    Major Amasova:

    "When this mission is over, I will kill you"

    It is supposed to be a dramatic moment, but I can't help laughing. As if that helpless damsel, who has been no more than a blind passenger through out the film, would be any threat to Bond! :))

    (The only way would be if she caught him unarmed with a gun after he has risked everything to save her life. Oh... well...)
    What makes this line even funnier is Bach's odd delivery:

    "Den...vhen dis mishun ees ovah...I veel keel you."
  • Thunderball007Thunderball007 United States
    Posts: 306
    This discussion is comedy gold! =))
  • XandacaXandaca
    Posts: 32
    "Ornithology, huh. Wow. Now there's a mouthful."

    JINX GLARES LUSTFULLY AT BROSNAN'S COCK.
  • mepal1mepal1
    Posts: 1,098
    'hiss off' Bond talking to a snake.....'sit' Bond talking to a Tiger.........and 'argh....argh...argh' Bond doing his Tarzan impression, all from the hunt scene in Octopussy........god give me strength, that was cringeworthy!
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    Posts: 23,883
    Xandaca wrote: »
    "Ornithology, huh. Wow. Now there's a mouthful."

    Tamahori really put her Oscar to good use in DAD. Way to capitalize on that award......sunk her like a stone....Catwoman was the death knell
  • Mendes4LyfeMendes4Lyfe The long road ahead
    Posts: 8,458
    bondjames wrote: »
    Xandaca wrote: »
    "Ornithology, huh. Wow. Now there's a mouthful."

    Tamahori really put her Oscar to good use in DAD. Way to capitalize on that award......sunk her like a stone....Catwoman was the death knell

    She came back big time in 'phone call'.
  • Thunderball007Thunderball007 United States
    Posts: 306
    The stuff in Die Another Day.. Omg! =))

    Here's one from Thunderball.

    Largo's delivery:

    "You let him get the better of you."     :))
  • Perilagu_KhanPerilagu_Khan
    Posts: 2,483
    Thunderball007 wrote: »
    The stuff in Die Another Day.. Omg! =))

    Here's one from Thunderball.

    Largo's delivery:

    "You let him get the better of you."     :))

    tee-hee-live-and-let-die_bond-villain.jpg

    Funny how the least little thing amuses him.

  • shamanimalshamanimal
    edited November 2015 Posts: 623
    Xandaca wrote: »
    "Ornithology, huh. Wow. Now there's a mouthful."

    Terrible, and she does the same thing later at the ice palace ... "You're a big boy".

    Why didn't someone working on the movie say "hey guys, hang on, we've had one big-dick innuendo cock-gaze from Jinx in this movie already! Do we need another?"

    They didn't need the first, of course.
  • bondjamesbondjames You were expecting someone else?
    Posts: 23,883
    shamanimal wrote: »
    Why didn't someone working on the movie say "hey guys, hang on, we've had one big-dick innuendo cock-gaze from Jinx in this movie already! Do we need another?"

    They didn't need the first, of course.

    Indeed. It was a bit too much really. Compounded by the following stinker from later on:

    "Oh, yeah, I think I got the thrust of it."
  • shamanimalshamanimal
    Posts: 623
    Compare Jinx meeting Bond, to Vesper meeting Bond in the following movie. Talk about chalk and cheese!
    It was a good idea to de-snigger the Bond movies.
  • SarkSark Guangdong, PRC
    Posts: 1,138
    I loved Roger's come on to Mayday. Some people really want to nitpick anything that isn't Oscar Wilde.
  • MayDayDiVicenzoMayDayDiVicenzo Here and there
    Posts: 5,080
    I think you're missing the point if you thought the Bond and May Day love scene was meant to be anything other than an amusing way to get out of trouble.
  • andmcitandmcit
    edited November 2015 Posts: 1,068
    AVTAK is one of my favourite Bonds (seems I'm in a minority on this one) and I fully understand the gag. It's just the ridiculous awful premise, the line delivery and the actuality of the scenario which is just awful. Had it been around in '85 I'm surprised Max didn't offer some spare viagra pills to MayDay to pass to Bond
  • Thunderball007Thunderball007 United States
    Posts: 306
    Perilagu_Khan wrote: »
    Thunderball007 wrote: »
    The stuff in Die Another Day.. Omg! =))

    Here's one from Thunderball.

    Largo's delivery:

    "You let him get the better of you."     :))

    tee-hee-live-and-let-die_bond-villain.jpg

    Funny how the least little thing amuses him.


    What? What is wrong? :P
  • Thunderball007Thunderball007 United States
    Posts: 306
    Gustav Graves

    "Armed... and very dangerous." :))
  • mcdonbbmcdonbb deep in the Heart of Texas
    Posts: 4,116
    Yet another negative thread...

    Why the worst? Why not Bond's best lines?

    :-@
  • ForYourEyesOnlyForYourEyesOnly In the untained cradle of the heavens
    edited November 2015 Posts: 1,984
    "Just being disarming, my dear..." That was actually pretty good for me.

    I didn't like the "All those feathers and he still can't fly" line, but the delicatessen one was by far the worst.

    Also, "Play it again, Sam" LOL.
  • Scaramanga12Scaramanga12
    Posts: 562
    mcdonbb wrote: »
    Yet another negative thread...

    Why the worst? Why not Bond's best lines?


    Perhaps you find the English sense of humour rather difficult to follow?



  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    I am quite familiar with the English sense of humour but err... I find little to no humour here other than addressing some things in negative manners that aren't worthy of the judgement at all? Like Sark said, some people like to nitpick anything that isn't Oscar Wilde, like Bond needs to be Oscar Wilde and Shakespeare.
  • mcdonbbmcdonbb deep in the Heart of Texas
    Posts: 4,116
    Scaramanga12 wrote: »
    mcdonbb wrote: »
    Yet another negative thread...

    Why the worst? Why not Bond's best lines?


    Perhaps you find the English sense of humour rather difficult to follow?



    No, maybe I was on a pity party when I commented. It's all good.

  • Perilagu_KhanPerilagu_Khan
    Posts: 2,483
    mcdonbb wrote: »
    Yet another negative thread...

    Why the worst? Why not Bond's best lines?


    Because the world isn't all peaches n' cream, and neither is Bond screenwriting.

  • MyNameIsMyBondRnMyNameIsMyBondRn WhereYouLeastExpectMeToBe
    Posts: 221
    ..The worst line of screenwriting, was that of the fate of the cutlery..!
  • LazinBeeLazinBee
    Posts: 7
    What about in Goldfinger, when Connery compares drinking warm champagne to listening to the Beatles without earmuffs? That criticism did not date well.
  • LazinBeeLazinBee
    Posts: 7
    Gerard wrote: »
    From TWINE : "I thought Christmas came only once a year." Grooooaaaaannnn!
    Definitely a contender.

  • SirHilaryBraySirHilaryBray Scotland
    Posts: 2,138
    AVTAK - Pola Ivanova: The bubbles tickle my... Tchaikovsky!
  • NicNacNicNac Administrator, Moderator
    Posts: 7,585
    Scaramanga12 wrote: »
    NicNac wrote: »
    You know what, it never in over 15 years occurred to me that it could be a different meaning of the word 'alive'.
    :-S

    Are you being deliberately obtuse? No one said she was using a different definition of alive. Can you not comprehend someone saying 'what keeps you alive?' without it referreing to the basic essentials of life?

    Erm, no I wasn't being obtuse. I was genuinely saying it never occurred to me. It really didn't. Your explanation made sudden sense to me where in the past I had always stuck rigidly with the one meaning.
  • OffspringFan88OffspringFan88
    Posts: 102
    Anything that comes out of Jinx's mouth in DAD. Still can't believe she ended up been the main Bond girl and the gorgeous Miranda Frost was the femme fatale, just criminal. I always feel sad when she dies at the end.
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